Good Afternoon, DUMBFUCK!


Children, hunker down for some good advice from you old Uncle Paul.  As you can see from the example, self-hatred can be a very ugly thing.  It can rot your soul away faster than a kidney ripening in the summer sunshine.

But you know what’s worse? Self-enforced lack of self-awareness.  In simpler terms , more understandable to children, this is also known as “Mommy! Make Sarah Stop Hitting Me Back!” Syndrome.

If you don’t want to see it out there…  

…don’t put it out there.


Author: Paul Krendler

The Thinking Man's Zombie

87 thoughts on “Good Afternoon, DUMBFUCK!”

  1. I personally love that DUMBFUCK doesn't understand that he's made it almost unavoidable that the picture he's so piously rending his garments over becomes part of the public record.

    Sending something to someone that you subsequently sue does makes it a matter of concern to the courts. I have a hard time seeing how at least one of the defendants defends himself without entering the threatening and harassing correspondence he received into evidence.

    Of course, there's no telling a DUMBFUCK that. You just have to let it happen.

    It seems to me that this presents a stark choice for a DUMBFUCK; drop its lulzsuit with prejudice or reap what it sows.

    As I'm not affiliated with the defense or its strategy, this should be taken as nothing more than good advice, which I have no doubt will be ignored.

  2. I've come to the opinion that he wants it published far and wide. He sent it out to people who have no reason whatsoever to protect him from himself. The only possible consequence to publishing it is embarrassment to him, and mild dismay in people who might see it.

    The thing is, he lacks any discernible capacity for shame, much less to be embarrassed.

    So...he wants it out there. So he can pretend that he's been harmed in some way by its publication. He's just got so little grasp on what normal people think and feel, that he imagines that this is the thing that will finally make some neutral observer [ideally, a judge] feel bad for him, because OMG THE PAIN.

    But who feels any anguish or sympathy for the guy who deliberately nails his own dick to his workbench? Disgust is the only reaction he would expect, if he was any good at all at thinking.

      1. Yeah, that's pretty much what it is, the 'by proxy' version, using another person's suffering to derive attention and sympathy for oneself. Wont work for such a deeply un-sympathetic creature as Schmuckfeldt.

    1. As I said at Billysez: he's gonna keep flogging her corpse until it gets him some sympathy.

      He "knows" people are supposed to be kind to the infirm and bereaved, so he keeps shoving that in people's faces. What he's never learned is that courtesy is reciprocal: his past failures to show that kindness has left no one with any obligation to show it to him.

      His problems don't stem from having "poor impulse control" -- they stem from his impulses being evil. Note: not bad, not wrong, evil. No person who is merely incorrect revels in sexual violation the way he does.

      The whole of Team Kimberlin deserves each other.

      1. The Diminished Capacity Kid lost any and all sympathy for his losing the Martyred Queen of Tincasa the second he started issuing hollow threats toward the profoundly disabled children of his "enemies."

        And in the truly remarkable eventuality that his lulzsuit ever gets before a jury, William's public mockery of child abuse pretty much settles the "character question." One thing that our drunken friend never seemed to understand is that his claims necessarily focus on HIS character, not anyone else's.

        He's the R.Budd Dwyer of personal injury litigation. Why pretend that he isn't? If Schmalfeldt didn't exist as an object of public derision, he'd have no reason to exist at all.

        By my estimation, Lulzsuit the Fifth should be dismissed by the end of this week, or early next. But William's endless displays of lunacy over the last several weeks leave him wide open to not only counterclaims, but motions seeking severe sanctions.

        Ely, of course, could not be reached for comment. It appears that he's pissed at Schmalfeldt, too.

  3. If he was any good at all at thinking, he would have come to the realization that it is only him against a a random group of people, and that that would indicate he is the one who is wrong. If he had any real or valid complaint, he would have drawn supporters from around the net to come to his aid. Instead, he is a lone irrational screeching voice, pestering the few people that have taken notice of him. Sure, sometimes a few folks make comments at Hoge's place in threads about BS, but that is really only because Hoge is a PITA to Kimberlin, and these trolls needs to stay in Brett's favor - not because they like or support BS. Some have cast this conflict between BS and the zombies/lickspittles as a Left/Right thing - that is not accurate. Based on hints some people have made, there are a few liberal/Left-leaning people in the group, and I have tried to not blame BS for his behavior based on a liberal ideology - it is because he is sociopath. He lies, even when the truth would serve him better. He derides or ignores insult and injuries he casts at others, and amplifies any directed at him. The only reason he isn't a completely evil threat is that he isn't smart enough to be really dangerous.

    TL;DR: He is a DUMBFUCK.

    1. For example, nobody reading this knows my political or religious preferences.

      I just love Schmalfeldt as a wildly entertaining, if borderline psychotic, way to pass the time. He's a figure of amusement, if you can stomach that sort of thing.

  4. I see little chance of the picture not being entered into evidence in the lolsuit. It's not a question of if a defendant will do it, it's which one,or how many do it.

    Then I anticipate that naturally Bill will try and seal the court record, at least for that one piece of evidence.

    If he is successful, I then predict that some bloggerjournalist will publish it.

    When challenged how he got it he will plead he received it anonymously in a plain brown envelope; and his journalistic ethics compelled him to publish it.

    I don't see this ending well.

    1. I'd love to hear his argument for sealing a picture he took and sent to his adversaries and a bunch of complete strangers.



      1. God knows, the threat of further lulzsuits has carried him this far ...

    1. Ah, so he's going to publicly register it. Because of the privacy!

      She married a real fucking prince, didn't she? She must be so relieved.

      1. Our drunken friend is wasting his time. It is my understanding that something anticipated to be a public exhibit is probably immune from copyright protection.

        He filed the lulzsuit against someone he sent it to. That makes it a potentially public exhibit for the defense. Since he sent it of his own free will to further his martyr complex, there are no reasonable grounds for the photo to be sealed.

        Once that happens, anyone who wants to publish the photo can probably do so by pubshing the exhibit page, to which copyright cannot apply.

        Strategy, as it turns out, isn't William's strong suit.

      2. Further to Pablo's point, registering the photo as copyrighted presumably makes it a publicly searchable document. After all, you have to search for a copyright to know that you aren't violating it.

        Another lulzsuit bring the photo into yet ANOTHER public realm.

        I'm starting to think that William wants to publish his own coffee table book.

      3. It also seems to me that copyright registrations might be considered frivolous spending for a pauper.

        But Bill should go with his gut. He wouldn't be where he today without it.

      4. Also, copyright protection doesn't mean no one can ever use the photo. It means that the income he might derive from using the photo is protected, because he can sue anyone else who derives income from the photo.

        So, anyone who derives no income from using it is safe from any copyright claims.

        Anyone who photoshops it in some transformative way would be free to derive income from that use.

        It would also be fair use to include the photo in a journalistic article about, for example, weird things weird people do, as a paragon of same.

    2. Except for that fair use thing you tried to use against John Hoge against his copyright suit, yeah, go ahead. Stupid is strong in you.

    3. He registered it today?

      I posted it to Instagram yesterday.

      To fucking late, Inspector Jiggles.

      But here's a year's supply of Eskimo Pies.

  6. Anyone that has followed Hollywood's war against Internet piracy has an idea how compllcated such litigation across international borders can be.

    All foreign readers, raise your hands.

    1. I'm torn.

      Part of me wants to reignite my long-dormant blog solely for the purpose of publishing the picture and demonstrating the many ways that William is impotent.

      On the other hand, I really enjoy the idea of his suffering the agony of knowing that it'll be an exhibit in his own ludicrous lulzsuit.

      That's not wrong, is it?


    Do save the receipt for your upcoming IFP hearing, William.

    Copyright registration is how much, again?

    Jesus, this retard makes winning lulzsuits look so ... easy.

    1. I was thinking the same thing. He is now purchasing copyright license to a photograph that he sent to someone directly.

      Unfortunately, he made no claim to it before it was published or shown. As such, now that the photograph is out there and exists, his claim will have a hard time being defended because:

      1) He never made a statement that the photograph was private and meant for eyes only.

      2) He never claimed to have copyright ownership of it.

      3) He has already shown photos of his wife in various places, including hospitals and, yet, has made no copyright claim to them. In fact, if you think about it, the owners of the photograph now include those who have received them because he gave implicit permission for the intended audience to use it as they see fit.

      So it would be interesting if someone were to say, challenge the copyright claim and watch it be denied. Then what? I would guess, more lulz...

      1. Well, he kinda sorta implied that it was meant to be private.

        You know, when he emailed it unsolicited to his Nemesis* and what, seven local LEOs with the message "So if this gets out I know HOOOOOGE!!! did it!" But this was mitigated somewhat when twenty minutes later he emailed a shared work account of unrelated people, at least one of whom showed her husband the sick email she had received.

        If you want to keep a picture private, keep it private. If you want to keep it unpublished, don't publish it. Especially don't publish it to people who would not piss on you if you were on fire.** People who if you were drowning would debate giving you a glass of water, or an anvil.

        "The truth hurts, doesn't it? Sure not as much as jumping on a bicycle with the seat missing, but it hurts just the same." Lt. Frank Drevin, Police Squad.

        * This could be debated, but a Nemesis is sent for your hubris, and Bill has more than enough hubris for Hoge, Krendler, Grady, to all simultaneously qualify. Pride goeth before an upturned wheely walker.

        **(granted, if I thought my BAC was sufficiently high I would piss on a flaming Bill.)

    2. If it was never intended for publication, WHY DID HE PUBLISH IT?!

      HE published it.

      HE distributed it.

      He sent it to complete strangers.

    3. Is that the case number in the e-mail from the Copyright Office?

      Someone needs to check if the photograph sent the Copyright is the same photograph which Billy previously sent unsolicited to the world.

  8. Acme Law President Emeritus Schmalfeldt once again shows all his excellent legal acumen by publishing newsworthy material with NO copyright notice then retroactively and frantically trying to undo publication and in so doing continues to screw up the validity of his IFP claim. Another bungled legal maneuver there Sir Schmucks.

    1. Give William credit, though. He makes it look so easy!

      Ely remains unavailable for comment.

    2. That's the kind of legal acumen that made him a Senior Fartner over at ACME.

  9. I note that Mr. "I NEVER!! delete tweets" has deleted at least one today. I wonder what it was about the photo that he felt went too far even for him.....


    This looks like an admission that the photo has no commercial value. That should make establishing copyright violation damages interesting.

    Way to think things through, Dumbass.

    1. At some point, manipulating a DUMBFUCK into making himself look stupid has to get boring, right?

      1. You would think so. But, as it turns out, AAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!!!!

      2. At this point, I think you could put up a post consisting entirely of punctuation, and not even much of it, and he'd still have at least a mini-feldtdown over it.

    2. He doesn't think things through. I'm not sure he has ever thought things through.

      Trying to play the "Woe is me, my wife just died" card to avoid having to take responsiblity for his own actions and attack those he perceives to be enemies is "defaming" her memory in ways far worse than anything he claims anyone else has ever done.

  11. Who the hell takes a picture of their terminally sick spouse?

    Who the hell then sends that picture to people he is currently suing or threatening to sue?

    Part of me wants this case to get past the motions for dismissal because I want to see the faces of the jury when they hear he did this.

    1. I know it's at cross-purposes with the named defendants in the lulzsuit, but I'd LOVE to see this before a jury.

      I should really look up whether or not Maryland is a contributory negligence state, but I'm very lazy. If it is, the lulz will be never ending watching William explain away his entire life with incoherent screaming about "DEAD WIFE! HORSESHIT! BOYFUCKING! DERANGED CYBERSTALKING!"

      You people should start acting like a serious country and federalize your civil codes.


        Then William had better start praying that this never gets to trial. Should it, the court will make him look even more foolish than even we do.

  12. Let's give William a measure of fairness, shall we?

    About two weeks ago, when he was in the clutches of Ely's imaginary lawerying, he was telling us that under no circumstances could any of us publish the images of, or even type the names of, William and Gail Schmalfeldt with the express written permission of Major League Baseball.

    in declaring copyright, he seems to have shifted back to reality, if only slightly.

    Maybe TJ's been too busy to make a booze run.

  13. Since presumably Bill took the picture he would have the copyright whether he registers it or not. Registration allows for statutory damages to be collected if he wins a case, he would not have to prove actual damages. Costs are not high, $35ish or so. Persons he sent the picture too could certainly use it in a law suit in various fair use situations as well. It would not give persons the right to reproduce the image, for other than fair use. It would be like getting a signed 8 x 10 of a movie star in the mail. You can post it on your wall, show them to friends, but not make copies and hand them out. I have not followed copyright law close enough to know if anything has made it to the courts in regards to casual sharing. If I send mom a picture of my dog I took and she posts in on Facebook, is that a copyright violation? Clearly commercial use is out. Note: this is not legal advice and I am not a lawyer.

  14. And there's now a lecture on spina bifida. More of that "sterling character" we've come to expect, which will be ever so illustrative in a contributory negligence state.

    You know what's going to be the Best Thing Ever?

    When William learns that Patrick Grady isn't Paul Krendler at all. The counter-suit is going to be jaw-dropping. If by some miracle of judicial malpractice, Lulzsuit the Fifth survives the two MTDs, I expect Schmalfeldt's much-implored affidavit to be forthcoming.

    If you're going to be a Deranged Cyberstalker, it behooves you to at least be a good one.

    So here's the bet. Who gets the keys to Tincasa first, Grady or Hoge?

      1. Given that he seemed to gain the weight just as quickly as she lost it, it would have made for the most boring see-saw ever!

      2. Did you read his blogs today? It seems that Gail had a moment of lucidity in her final days as she FINALLY realized she had to strangle the tub of mayo.

    1. Isn't it awesome how William's lulzsuit has necessarily made Gail's karking a matter of public interest?

      Unintended consequences are a bitch!

      1. I'm sure it was devastating to watch her go from a $25.00 trick to a $10.00 trick in less than a year.

        Fucking websites don't pay for themselves.He really had no choice but to kill her.

      2. Business decision. Trump would understand. A fresh corpse can go for fifty!

        By the way, William has never provided documentation that he turned over the body, has he?

        Does anyone have a DOOM CLOCK?

      3. While what Howard and I are doing is unspeakably cruel, no crippled kids are being dragged across multiple time zones as a result of our ugly joshing.

        That should really be a disclaimer on all of our posts.

  15. Bill "Poop flinging Dancing Monkey" Schmalfeldt says:

    "I have nothing but contempt for shit slingers who squeal like children when the shit they throw gets thrown back at them."

    So the Poop flinging Dancing Monkey does not like when his "shit" get thrown back at him, looks in the mirror in the morning and has nothing but contempt for the face he sees.

  16. FWIW, here is the beginning of the original email containing the picture the Cabin Boy™ is having a snit over—

    "Dear Sheriff DeWess, et al:

    "I have copied Mr. William John Joseph Hoge III of 20 Ridge Road, Westminster, in this communication."

    That establishes that he originally sent the photo to the Carroll County Sheriff's Office and copied me.

    1. Well, he's a congenital liar. William will destroy potential evidence to prove that he's incapable of telling the truth.

      Ask Ely.

      1. But ... but ... I thought Schmalfeldt check his outgoing emails! He said so on Twitter!

        My stars, I do declare that the man is a LIAR!

        And just as I was going to post an email showing that he said so, he deleted his account, provig my original point.

      2. Given that a DUMBFUCK deleted his Twitters again, which he NEVER does, I suppose he'll start ranting at Billy Sez again.

        Krendler, you really should rethink your policy about not letting him comment here.

      3. Wow. I guess he figured out that he really went off the deepend as far as incriminating statements today.

        Sadly for him, the internet is forever.

        1. You say you want to engage in some spoliation of evidence? The Zombie Hoard brings you a ditty from Ms. Carole King:

    2. He was sure he only sent it to Hinkley's wife. But then again, he harassed her and I'm sure she has a much stronger claim for damages than he does. Meanwhile, the picture is out there and he's going to claim a copyright.

  17. Based on the latest tweet and blog post, Grady's family will have an incredible countersuit and/or claim for violating the restraining order.

    1. Yeah, a DUMBFUCK's gotta DUMBFUCK.

      It's all a part of the circle of life.

      It'll still be pretty jaw-dropping to watch, though. Especially the part where Schmalfeldt takes no responsibility for suing the wrong guy, and repeatedly invades the privacy of a minor.

      I don't think an "I'm sorry" will fix that,

      Seriously, who gets dibs on Tincasa, Grady or Hoge? Twenty says Hoge,

      1. Oooh, I'll take that. Hoge isn't being sued, Grady's got a huge lead there.

        But I think Edgren's gonna edge 'em all out.

        Wait, twenty.. what? Oho. You sly, sly dog...

      2. I'm not going to say that you're wrong, but I think the Grace's Law nonsense gives WJJH the edge on this.

      3. Indeed, if WJJH would like an affidavit, I can swear one out demonstrating that the allegations William made against him went not only beyond the state of Maryland, but outside the United States.

        That, one supposes, increases damages substantially.

  18. Interesting. Bill, the great medical communicator, the one with all the NIH contacts, apparently has no idea what causes spina bifida. And he therefore decides to accuse a father of being the one responsible, although not enough folic acid in the mother is the usual cause. And he digs up every possible snide and cutesy name for the defect that he can fine, I guess to show what a caring person he is.

    The man needs to be locked up, or at least be deprived of the internet for the rest of his life. He really won't like it if law enforcement won't take control of the situtation and he pisses off the wrong mama bears.

    1. Yeah, that's a good one to toss on the counter-claim pile.

      The best part? Even if William transfers title after having published that, young Thomas J might be on the hook for damages.

      He's quite a familt man, that Bill!


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