A Little Q & A

Over on his new-and-improved Twitter account, the Deranged, Multiple-State Adjudicated Cyber Harasser and Stalking Oedipal Troll has posed a series of questions.  At the moment, it seems like it could be…


…to answer them.

When did I become a professional comedian?

This is a loaded question, dripping with late-stage Parkinson’s dementia.  If he doesn’t remember, I don’t see why I should help. 

But for the sake of the FUN, it all started when you started writing and recording funny (always a subjective descriptor, but we’ve had THAT conversation before.  You probably don’t remember it) things and putting them up for sale.  That’s what professionals do.  They exchange their knowledge, services, products and craftsmanship for value in the form of MONEY.  You have said many times that you are selling copies of books and CDs.

Are you not a professional, being paid for his efforts, as unfunny as they may be?

Or are you just lying, like you always do?

Now, if you could find a way to get someone to pay you for the flailing monkeydancing you do when Howard or I push your buttons, you could make some REAL money!

I understand the hatred. What I can’t understand is lying about the reasons for the hatred. Or the cowardly way the cowards express it.

You soooo overestimate your place in the pecking order.  I don’t hate you.  I don’t think anybody hates you.  Hate requires energy, passion and fire, and I don’t think anyone of us Lickspittle Zombies has that kind of energy to spare on you.  I can only speak for myself, but what I feel for you is an overwhelming sense of pity.  Some disgust.  Revulsion.  Sometimes that queasy feeling you get from burping up a tiny bit of vomit?  I feel that, too.

And this cowardice of yours that you continuously project into me!  That’s funny, though not in a way that would get you paid.  It’s also incorrect.  I’m no coward.  I guarantee you that if I filed a Peace Order petition, or whatever they call it in my state, against you, I’d show up in court.  And if you were ever lightning-strike lucky enough to figure out where to serve me with a Peace Order of your own, you can be damn sure I’d show up in court in Howard County.

Not like you, you brave sir Knight!  The way you took to the hills last month when you realized Mr. Grady was coming to call your obvious bluff was some entertaining shit!  Too bad you couldn’t get paid for that! That was worth real money.

No, I’m no coward.  There’s another word for people like me who shoot from cover and hit their target with consistent, deadly accuracy, and that word is sniper.

You won’t ever catch me.

How can you know for a fact someone is NOT Chris Heather but not know WHO he is? Makes no sense.

I beg to differ.  When laid next to your certainties over the last week that a) EPWJ mailed you horseshit, and then b) Howard D. Earl (who must be Chris Heather) mailed you horseshit, and then c) LibraryGryffon knows who mailed you horseshit and knows who Chris Heather is, and then d) Grace mailed you horseshit, and then e) I know who mailed you horseshit, and then f) I mailed you horseshit, and then g) Hoge mailed you horseshit, it makes far more sense than anything you’ve supposed is true.  You are merely too thick to see that, and I am not interested enough to educate you.

Because when you are stupid (and you are very, VERY STUPID) you monkeydance.  And when you monkeydance, I have FUN!

Goodness @brainsrfood sure likes to write about poop.

No, you mental midget.  I like to write about you.  But there’s hardly a difference, and we both know that, don’t we?


Author: Paul Krendler

The Thinking Man's Zombie

21 thoughts on “A Little Q & A”

  1. I was planning on hating Willy tonite, but today's the day I usually clean the lint out of my bellybutton, so..........that.

  2. I did, however, have a rather loose bowel movement yesterday, which I dedicated to Willy. Is that hate?

  3. "No, you mental midget. I like to write about you. But there’s hardly a difference, and we both know that, don’t we?"

    I hope you called your shot!

  4. Bill likes to accuse those who "hate" him with not being good Christians. Obviously he doesn't understand that God wants us to hate sin and evil. So while we are not to hate the sinner, we actually must hate the sins. By tolerating wicked behaviour, and not calling it out so that the sinner has a chance to repent and others a chance to avoid the sin, we are actually not being truly loving.

    Psalm 36: 1-4

    1 Transgression speaks to the wicked
    deep in their hearts;
    there is no fear of God
    before their eyes.
    2 For they flatter themselves in their own eyes
    that their iniquity cannot be found out and hated.
    3 The words of their mouths are mischief and deceit;
    they have ceased to act wisely and do good.
    4 They plot mischief while on their beds;
    they are set on a way that is not good;
    they do not reject evil.

    Romans 9

    Let love be genuine; hate what is evil, hold fast to what is good

    Proverbs 8:13

    13 The fear of the Lord is hatred of evil.
    Pride and arrogance and the way of evil
    and perverted speech I hate.

    I've found a very interesting short discussion on hatred here: http://www.hebrew4christians.com/Holidays/Spring_Holidays/Yom_Hashoah/Evil/evil.html

    1. Brava LG! Excellent references. And while some of us do falter and slip toward meeting bil in the depths of his own style; for the most part we are successful at calling his filth, filth.

  5. At some point you would think he would wise up and realize that every time he goes up against the Lickspittle Zombie horde he gets humiliated. But that's the wonderful thing about Bill. He seems incapable of learning.

    1. Or he prefers the public humiliations to those in the privacy of his own home.

      A grotesquely overweight, impotent cuckold who forgets which day he fell on his face and why doesn't inspire hatred as much as mirth.

      1. Wait, did Krendler just compare bil to Paul Newman's "Cool Hand Luke"?

        Granted bil probably smells like he ate fifty egg.

  6. I see Bill is back to his old trick of "Insult someone so they give up information". I also notice the liberal use of the homoerotic insults too. Man really does have an issue with that doesn't he?

    Bill, here's the thing. You say very stupid stuff. Daily. It's like you WANT the humiliation. Just get it over with. Put on your leathers and go find an aggressive top to give you what you want.


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