Time with [She Who Must Be Off Limits, unlike Mrs. Hoge, Mrs. Stranahan, Mrs. Grady, Mrs. Walker, Mrs. McCain, the Daughters Johnson and the Daughter Gryffon…oh, for fuck’s sake – GAIL! Her name is Gail! Gail, Gail, Gail! Sue me!] is the most important thing to me, now more than ever.
– W.M. Schmalfeldt
This quote will remain at the top of this blog until one of the following (in approximate order of likelihood):
1. He dies
2. He starts to behave as if he believes what he has said
3. He leaves the internet for two whole weeks
I’ll be over here not turning blue.
The devil (in mid-MonkeyDance) can cite Scripture for his purpose.
An evil soul producing holy witness
Is like a villain with a smiling cheek,
A goodly apple rotten at the heart:
O, what a goodly outside falsehood hath!
The Merchant of Venice
Act I, Scene III
And if you ever needed the proof of it – look no further than here.
The trouble with most comedians who try to do satire is that they are essentially brash, noisy and indelicate people who have to use a sledgehammer to smash a butterfly.
– Imogene Coca
As a parodist, I find it perfectly acceptable to use a sledgehammer to smash a satirist.