In Which a Poodle Fails

So here we see Very Ordinary Cuck Fifi admitting – at the very least -that WJJ Hoge was once relevant, which is something neither he nor Bill Schmalfeldt have ever been able to claim…

nor have I, except in one very narrow and specific area, that of completely owning Bill Schmalfeldt, a task so simple it’s hardly worth calling relevant; still, we do what we can…

…or, past performance being an indicator of present and future result, I think this is much more likely, Fifi is simply WRONG again.

And Bill, don’t let Fifi wind you up to try and take the pressure off your most excellent serial bomber/domestic terrorist friend. We all know that if the FBI is doing their job they’ve already talked to him.


Who Is “They,” DUMBFUCK?


Who are “THEY?” Democrats?

Who are “THEY?” Idiots?

Or are “THEY” just people like you? You know, these guys:

Somehow, though…I don’t think this is what RACIST Bill Schmalfeldt is referring to when he uses the word “they.”

I think if Bill Schmalfeldt thought he wouldn’t be kicked out of #TheResistance by Inflat-a-skank, he would be using the word “they” and the phrase “brown people” a lot closer together than he currently does.

Because if there is one thing we know about Bill Schmalfeldt, it’s that he is obsessed with poop…

If there are two things we know about Bill Schmalfeldt,  they are that he is obsessed with poop and he likes to fake illnesses for sympathy.

Damn! If there are four things –


– THREE THINGS we know about Bill Schmalfeldt, we know he is obsessed with poop, he fakes illnesses for sympathy and his lawsuits end up like skunks in the road- stinking and dead halfway to completion.

CHRIST!!! If there are FOUR THINGS (see? I told you it was four!) that we know about Bill Schmalfeldt, he’s obsessed with poop, he fakes illnesses, his lawuits stink and he projects the guilt for his own behaviors onto his enemies.


Wow! Six Whole Months!

Except for last Friday, of course.

And a couple of times last week.

About a dozen in the last month.

Approximately 75-90 days with visits to this very blog since you nutshuffled off to Oklahoma and your inevitable firing, um…I mean, “forced re-retirement.”

I’d post them all, but frankly, while you are dangerous enough to justify passive monitoring for the rest of your worthless life, you’re not important enough to generate copious backups of information.

Small? This is only true in the sense that we weigh less than you.

Just think, DUMBFUCK, how much you would enjoying being left alone in your retirement, if only you had extended the same courtesy years ago.

Go ahead, eat it! You used to love this stuff. What happened?

Ah, well. You had your chances. Too late now.


Welcome Back, Shit For Brains

Remember, he got fired in Oklahoma because to use his own words, he want to be “free to say what I really think about stuff.”

And since we all know that what he spends most of his time thinking about is the stuff that comes out of his ass, we can now expect increased levels of highbrow wit such as the example above.

Welcome back, DUMBFUCK!


Why I “Quit” My Day Job

When I conned my way into the post of program director and morning show host at KGYN in Guymon, OK, it was with the understanding that KGYN was a conservative talk station in a conservative area and I would need to focus on doing a happy news morning radio show and keep my flaming Godless communist opinions to myself. At first, it was easy. I spent the first three months silently laughing at my co-workers and my listeners. But as we got closer to the midterms, I started to use my Twitter page as a liberal platform, which quite understandably pissed off the bosses. I had also temporarily been the station manager while the post was vacant, but when that happened, they made a “hurry up” hire to get someone – anyone – in house that could rein me in.

He took the keys to the station Twitter account away from me on September 15. You’ll notice it hasn’t been updated since. He also made me take all references to the station off of my personal Twitter account. I used to be @BillMathewsKGYN with logos and call letters and slogans all over my bio. I took that all down and became the very generic @GuymonRadioGuy.

Another thing that bothered me was the way April Coble had total freedom on Twitter to be her liberal self.  Oh, I grifted her real good, too. She told me about all the lickspittles she blocked out of hand when they tried to tell her about my previous exploits as a cyberstalker, just like I told her they would.

The real problem was that, as program director, it became obvious that the syndicated hosts on the station, in the wake of the Kavanaugh confirmation, were now using the Alinsky “By Any Means Necessary” playbook that had served us progressives so well in the Obama years.  They had finally figured out that the way to cling to power was to punch back twice as hard as the Democrats, lie twice as much as Claire McCaskill, DiFi and Chuck Schumer, and scare the GOP base in the same way we’ve been scaring African Americans out to the pools for the last 50 plus years.

Oh, and get the economy roaring again. And cut taxes. And drop unemployment below 4%. And create more job openings than there are unemployed people on the books to fill them.

Fucking Trump. #OrangeManBad

At KGYN, right-wing thought prevails. Mike Gallagher is on the air from 9 until 11. The white supremacist Laura Ingraham is on from noon until 2. The right wing goofball Joe Pags is on from 5 until 8. That’s 7 hours out of the broadcast day devoted to rational thought, and as program director, I had to sit there and listen to all of it. Everybody thinking and using logic and reason…I had no idea what they were talking about. I just knew it made my fee-fees hurt. I couldn’t wait to get home, turn on MSNBC and watch the Antifa mobs harassing people in the streets of New York and chasing them out of restaurants in Washington and dragging them out of their cars in Portland before being challenged and running away like I did from Maryland to Wisconsin in 2015. And all the Kavanaugh protesters disrupting the hearings – AND GETTING PAID TO DO IT! Lucky fuckers. I can’t wait for the impeachment hearings. I love peaches…

What was I talking about? Oh yeah.

But I was staying up until four in the morning watching MSNBC just to wash the conservative thought out of my brain and replace it with muh libruhl feeeeeels. I wasn’t getting any sleep, and Ream-o of the Jerks was getting upset with me. She wanted to get married, she wanted new teeth, she wanted, this, that, and the other thing, she wouldn’t shut the fuck up!

Finally – AND THIS IS WHERE YOU CAN TELL I’M LYING – it was the Elizabeth Warren controversy that finally pushed me off the fence. You see, I was the program director at this station. It was my job to keep it on the air so that the local yokels can hear content they enjoy and patronize the advertisers who sponsor that content and pay my sub-minimum wage, and I knew that going in. But keeping the power on for these Okie dumbasses was just too much.

The new station manager could tell I was on the verge of going postal, so on Monday, he did a very smart thing. I finished my show, and he told me he’s taken the liberty of having my meager belongings packed and driven to the train station in Lubbock, and here’s your ticket. Don’t let the door hit ya where the dog bit ya.

Now I no longer have to put up with the voices of hatred on the radio.

Just my fiancée. And the ones in my own head.

And that will have to do.


Looks Like Someone Is Grounded!

I notice that certified whackadoodle Guymon Radio Guy Bill Schmalfeldt, oops! – I mean, Mathews hasn’t tweeted since October 15th.

I wonder if this gentle swipe at a syndicated host on his station:

pissed off the boss?

Makes you think maybe – just maybe – ol’ DUMBFUCK no longer has the personal freedom to tell his bosses to piss off when they tell him to shut the fuck up about politics.

Maybe – just maybe – he never did.

Maybe – just maybe – he didn’t actually quit with zero notice back in Iowa last year.

Maybe – just maybe – he’s a fucking liar.

Oh, and one more thing. This line from his tweet:

Leave me out of this “we” because he doesn’t talk like I do, or like most thinking people.

I’ll bet I’m not the only one who thinks “people who talk like Bill Schmalfeldt” and “most thinking people” are circles that don’t touch on a Venn diagram.