Hey, Lying Racist Motherfucker!

Keep a close eye on the Maryland docket today.  I foresee that an order allowing himto attend the trial via Skype will NOT be posted by close of business today.

If he isn’t already in transit northward, he really ought to be.

And this begs a question – where will his balloon animal betrothed be next week?

Will she stay in South Kakalacky to take care of Onyx, or will she come north to nursemaid the bald pussy?

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WURT DUR FURK Is a Supersedeas Bond?

Over in the comments of this post at Sonoran Conservative, a John Doe commenter mentions something called a supersedeas, or appeal bond.

This was a new term of legal art for me.  But, they say you learn something new every day. I’ll let Wikipedia explain:\

After litigation and a civilcourt ruling, the losing party can appeal against the judgment. At this point, both the plaintiff and defendant could have similar kinds of concerns. An appeal takes time and can be dragged out in some cases for many years. After the case (and any other processes) are finally decided, whichever party wins will perhaps be more “out of pocket” from its costs. Also time will have passed, and the losing party may be bankrupt or have used the time to frustrate any potential future payments in the event of losing.

Therefore, it is often either a requirement of the law, or a possible point in a ruling, that prior to commencing its appeal processes, the losing party must provide a surety bond – money it pays to the court or a third party, to demonstrate its good faith, intention and commitment to meeting the ruling if it loses, and in some cases to show that their appeal is not frivolous or merely a tactic to delay or avoid payment. This is known as a supersedeas (or “appeal”) bond, and shows that they can and will cover the damages or fees awarded – including any additional costs of the appeal.

The bond may not be – and often is not – the exact value of the ruling. In some cases it is significantly larger since it is planned to cover interest or other costs which may arise on appeal.

A supersedeas bond is often paid in full – and may be handled via insurance or underwriting in some cases.

What are some of the advantages of a supersedeas bond?

Obtaining a supersedeas bond may appear to be judicial red tape; however, it serves the best interest of the defendant and plaintiff. The appellant uses a supersedeas bond to stay the execution of the judgment, meaning appellant does not have to pay the full amount of the judgment until the appellate court makes a ruling and then only if the ruling is to affirm the judgment. A surety bond also replaces the need for collateral. The plaintiff, or party to whom the money judgment is awarded, is fully protected by the bond and ensured payment, that is if the appealing party can afford the bond.

Interesting stuff.

Big takeaway?

Appeals are NOT FREE, even for a poor, poor, judgment proof pitiful pro se  pauper.

OOPSIE POOPSIE!

Sure hope that field goal attempt works out…*snerk*

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Let’s Fisk Again, Like We Did Last Summer

STUPID Lying Motherfucker Bill Schmalfeldt left a comment at the Artisan Craft Blog yesterday which is deserving of some special attention…

You obviously do not have a copy of the first e-mail I sent to Ms. Hinckley. I, however, do.

Hey, what a coincidence! So do I! Although the copy I was provided had the images redacted, because most people (present company excluded) had more respect for your wife’s dignity than you did.

The one where I wrote, “As your husband was one of the people suggesting my wife’s death was a scam I was trying to pull on people, I feel you deserve to see this picture. If it gets published anywhere, I will know who did it as it hasn’t been published anywhere else.” A normal person would read that as an instruction to NOT publish the picture. But look at who spread the picture around…

No, a normal person would read that as the weak roar of a toothless lion who already knows that once he presses the SEND button, that picture is gonna get published, and that lion is not interested in PREVENTING its publication but is in fact ACTIVELY FACILITATING IT. And in telegraphing that he knows there is absolutely nothing he can do to stop it, and nothing he can do to anyone (like me) who chooses to publish it.

Oh, wait… the COPS sent it to Grady!
No, it was the authorities in Carroll County! THOSE bastards sent the photo to Grady.

Wrong and wrong.  No one sent it to Grady.

Someone sent it to me. The email said Mort in Maryland. I think that name might have been fake.

Grady was the first one to publish it.

Wrong again.

Now, because karma, Grady no longer has a wife.

Oh, please…please expand on the unique knowledge that you have of Grady’s divorce, all while trying to explain how HE’S STALKING YOU, YOU STUPID LYING MOTHERFUCKER.

The only difference? Mine did not choose to leave me.

Janina and Janice would like a word.

Shame on you all.

Your game, your rules.  You first.

 

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Why Steal Tweets? Why Not?

Sometimes, with some people…extra precautions are necessary when documenting very dangerous levels of stupidity.

And by dangerous I mean “handling nitroglycerin” dangerous.  The kind of dangerous that fear pee-soaked, sandy vagina, nutshuffling penises will delete without warning in a sudden explosion of rank cowardice.

Take this guy, for instance: he might be a world record holder in Twitter cowardice, with the most lost, abandoned or suspended Twitter handles in history. But since he’s a SJW-pussy, Twitter just lets him keep on keepin’ on, as long as his impotent attacks are directed at acceptable targets, even if they are so far out of his intellectual class they might as well be orbiting a different star (and I think that’s everybody who isn’t made of latex and living in a hotel).

This particular DUMBFUCK recently peed himself in an effort to show how the lawsuit in which he is currently sinking fast as a defendant will hinge on HOW TWITTER WORKS rather than on HOW A CONTRACT WORKS.

The reason he wants to argue about Twitter and not about contracts is painfully obvious to anyone with a double digit IQ.

But that’s not the purpose of this post.

The purpose of this post is to explore the reasons why Zombies like myself take screen caps of people’s tweets.

In three simple words: “Because they’re cowards.”

The image you see above is a screencap of a tweet. It’s STOLEN.  (shhh! our little secret…)

I made an image file of it, and uploaded it to an image hosting site.

Why would I do that?

So I could EMBED the URL of the tweet underneath it when I included the image in this post.  You’ll notice that the cursor changes because the image is a link.  Click it, if you want to go to a DUMFUCK Twitter account.

So there must be some advantage to doing this, right?

Indeed there is!

If you were an enterprising zombie, and you chose to delve into the archives on this site, you would find no small number of posts that make somewhat less sense now than they did when they were first published. The reason for this is that I followed the Twitter terms of service and embedded a tweet in the post.

And then the owner of the tweet (GUESS WHO?!?) deleted the tweet, and often the entire account, because he figured out that he might get in trouble for it, and that if he deleted the whole thing the trouble would vanish. Kind of like the old “Family Circus” cartoons:

Y’all remember the name of the oldest kid, don’tcha? Of course you do!

What I have done – what is necessary to do with someone who refuses to produce documents in discovery – is retain an image of the original tweet, so that certain nutshuffling footlong lovers who enjoy watching men fellate other men

It’s true!

can’t delete the evidence of their perfidy and later deny it ever happened.

So you can call it theft if you like, but wouldn’t it just be easier to use the term that a certain DUMBFUCK himself favors:

EVIDENCE GATHERING.

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Poor, Poor, Pitiful DUMBFUCK

No matter how many new blogs…

No matter how many new Twitter handles…

No matter how many new podcasts…

No matter how many new wives…

He can’t change who he is…

He will always be Bill Schmalfeldt, Demented Cyberstalker.

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He Made A Fecal Case Out Of It

It was either “eat shit and do nothing about it,” or make a poopie in federal court that he would eventually be forced to eat anyway. He chose the latter.

I will be the second to admit. Bill Schmalelddt has never filed a successful lawsuit. (Not for lack of trying, mind you – just for lack of having a case. Or intelligence.) Every suit he has filed has been dismissed before reaching a point of being considered on the merits. This is because Bill Schmalelddt is too stupid to fashion a complaint that can survive a motion to dismiss for any of a dozen or so reasons. The same could be said about the defendants in his attempts to get some justice for the years of undue harassment that has been returned to him in his prescribed three-for-one ratio to what he has dished out.

It COULD be said, if the dozens of defendants he has tried to sue over the past three years had ever tried to sue him…but only one has. That case goes to trial in August. The outlook for Schmalelddt is similar to his general opinion of women – DIM.

No one – yet – has ever beaten him on the merits, for two reasons:

  1. None of his lawsuits ever reaches a point where the merits are judged. This is fortunate for Schmalelddt because when he files a LOLSUIT, there are no merits to consider;
  2. No one pays him enough mind to sue him for defamation, because his character and reputation are such that nothing he says on any subject can be taken seriously by a reasonable person.

Oh, sometimes people thump their chests without ever crediting the “disgraced” attorney who beat him like a redheaded stepchild in Wisconsin and was well paid for it. Poor Schmalelddt – he just knows so much that isn’t so.

He doesn’t have an attorney. He had one once, a charity attorney in Illinois who told him to run along home and quit bothering people with more important things to do than wipe his tears and rub ointment on his aching butt. No, he does this all by his lonesome, with the moral support of his imaginary friends and inflatable ladyboi. Besides, he’s smarter than any old dumb, disgraced lawyer anyway! There are no guarantees of success, but I do believe that he’s learned some things along the way.

OK, just kidding!! He hasn’t learned ANYTHING.

He thinks jurisdiction (subject matter and personal) is handled differently in South Carolina; he found a case that he thinks says it’s based on where the VICTIM dwells. Sadly, no. But even though he has burned his free amendment in an effort to fix some other flaw that was explicitly pointed out to him (but which he still didn’t believe until he was once more proven to be an utter fool), it’s still too early to educate the monkey. He thinks venue is also correct for the same reasons.

One reason there is no need right now to educate the monkey, or even bother to be concerned with it, is because the suit will be dismissed by the Magistrate Judge before any defendant needs to make an argument regarding his whimsical notions of jurisdiction and venue.

This is just the first step on a long journey – about 25 feet to the edge of the cliff, and then a long 2000 foot drop. This is why he told Dave Alexander the other day that he’s lucky he and Sarah Palmer live in the same state (as far as he knows – ha ha ha). He thinks he could not file under a diversity jurisdiction if two parties live in the same state. Sarah won the obviously rigged coin toss.

Remember – he’s learned some things along the way. Not enough things to get a lawsuit past motions to dismiss, or even to the point of being served, but things. That he’s learned. Like the cure for Fakinson’s disease can be found on the shores of Lake Michigan, where you will magically regain the physical dexterity if not the mental acuity required to safely drive a car again. Yay!

I have a very good idea how this will end up.

Just like all the other VII LOLSUITS filed by Bill Schmalelddt.

WJJ Hoge II and his readers, as well as defendants Johnson, Palmer and Grady will never see a summons, never have to file a motion to dismiss, never have to craft an answer and will not have to spend a moment of serious thought on Schmalelddt’s case. (Note: this case comes with sooper sekrit subpoena powah. If Schmalelddt wants to find out who I am, he will find a whole new set of obstacles to overcome.)

But I HATE to spoil the surprise!

Hoge will say he has foreseen this.

EVERYBODY foresaw this, from the moment he moved out of Iowa, the gigantic sand-filled pussy.

Of course, foresight is always more impressive when one can predict something that hasn’t happened yet.

Like, say, that Schmalelddt’s pro se complaint will be subject to review by a magistrate judge and likely be”killed in its crib?” That was foreseen.

Or that Schmalelddt would be expertly manipulated into quickly burning his free first amendment to correct something in his complaint that he maintained at first wasn’t even wrong? That was foreseen too.

Or finally, that Schmalelddt would leave behind multiple other fatal flaws in his Amended Complaint (and even make some things WORSE THAN BEFORE)? That also was foreseen.

So it looks like he had a choice between eating a turd and laying one. Like seven times before, “CLEANUP ON AISLE LOLSUIT!” Send the DUMBFUCK and make sure he brings his big spoon.

BOY…Thank goodness he was never “emotionally invested” in this one.

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Wouldn’t It Just Be Easier

…if you stopped pretending you understand how this all works…

…and admitted to yourself and to the world once and for all…

…that you are the DUMBFUCK idiot that even Balloon Boi knows you are?

Or, just keep entertaining us:

As a wise man once whined, “There is no justice for the Schmalelddts of the world, only for HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGE!!!S.”

Some truths are worth writing on Post-It notes and leaving in plain sight.  That’s one of them.

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Good Afternoon, DUMBFUCK!

Okay, so to recap – making accusations without proof is bad again.

In that case, does anyone remember when KMCN-FM the MAC 94.7 host Broadway Bill Schmalfeldt begged and begged like the puling pussy he is for someone, anyone to take down the turdsrfood.wordpress.com website that someone started?

Does anyone remember when he started accusing me of being behind it? Does anyone recall that fat jackass providing even one bit of proof?

And of course it was him, not me, who outed Vinnie Virgintino, Thomas Puzo Sr., Miriam Lazewatsky and dog trainers various and sundry up and down the Eastern seaboard? (Guess what, DUMBFUCK? Just because you delete your fuck-ups does not mean the INTERNET IS NOT STILL FOREVER.)

It was him, not me, who determined that Howard Earl was Jerry Fletcher was Chris Heather was Jeremy Kinsey was Robin Causey was Paul Krendler was Eric Schultz was Owain Pennilyn was John Hoge IV was Grace the San Francisco hairdresser was Ashterah was the Dread Pirate Zombie was Asherahresearch was Laura Ashley was Ashley Wilkes was Wilkes Chamberlain was Richard Chamberlain was Jason Bourne was Matt Damon was Damon Runyon was Ring Lardner was James Garner was Jim Rockford was Rocky Balboa was Snake Plissken.

Seriously? 

It was him, not not me, who spread disgusting deathbed photos of his so-called soulmate, the best woman he ever met (out of maybe 6 total, not including the Japanese whatever-you-want-to-call-him), and that’s how much respect he has for her, to spew that photo all over the internet.

What about those photos of someone allegedly abusing a cadaver that he says that I sent him?  Does anyone recall the proof that it was me?

And all those times he has accused me of being the person behind the creation of, and multiple guffaw-inducing updates to his personal page at Encyclopedia Dramatica?  Does anyone remember him ever offering a shred of proof?

And the many times he has accused me of being some guy from Palatine, Illinois, without ever providing a single shred of proof?

And last year, when Agent Starling took time from her busy schedule to drive to the Palace of the Ninjanuns in St. Francis, Wisconsin to take a photo of the car he bought, after YEARS of lying about being unable to drive because EXACERBATED PARKINSON’S or some such bullshit, and DUMBFUCK Broadway Bill Schmalfeldt posted this lie:

Here’s a hint, for a turdsniffing moron: it wasn’t me, it wasn’t a car, and it didn’t have Illinois plates.

I know who Agent Starling was, I know what he was driving, and I know what state the plates were from.

I challenge lying crapnugget & sandpacked pussy Broadway Bill Schmalfeldt, minimum wage midday host at KMCN-FM in Clinton Iowa, to publish that picture.

I know he never will though. He doesn’t have any such picture because it doesn’t exist, and because he’s a lying piece of shit, and a credit to the character of the no-account radio station who hired him.

Again, that radio station is KMCN- FM the MAC 94.7 in Clinton Iowa, where they play everything, with the possible exception of THE KIDDIE PORN HOMOSEXUAL BOY SCOUT PARODIES BILL SCHMALFELDT CREATED AND TRIES TO SELL ON AMAZON.

IT’S THIS ONE:

OH, AND THIS ONE, TOO:

Those two links to Amazon, and the titles?  Those are called “proof.”

Because making accusations without proof is bad again.

Or maybe it’s only bad to make accusations about Broadass Bill Schmalfeldt, the lying pussy behind the mike from 1 – 5 afternoons at KMCN-FM in Clinton, Iowa.

Maybe it’s only okay when he does it to others.

Which he does all the time.

 

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