Good Morning, DUMBFUCK!

What are your feelings on accusing rocket scientists and lawyers of being pedophiles (just like your creepy buddy Brett Kimberlin in Maryland is!)?

Have you seen any benefit, political or otherwise, from your very recent advocacy in that area?



Because I can only DREAM of who will replace The Notorious RBG…


Speaking of Tragedies

It might be tragic if you believed Trump cares what ANYONE thinks of him, considering a long and documented record simply not giving a fuck about anything but getting the deal done.

On the other hand, I think it would be a serious mistake to believe that Bill Mathews of KGYN Guymon Oklahoma (born Bill Schmalfeldt, documented disease faking, valor stealing, restraining order collecting, turd sniffing, shitrolling toddlerstalking pro se failure, gets the same level respect from his best friends that John McCain gets from his worst enemies.


So My Question Is…

When I see someone tweeting that their TV station, radio station or newsroom is getting an “update to their security processes” aka active shooter training, and the reason given is the change in “climate” over the last year or so, I have to ask what changed:

Is it the quality and tone of the product the media is selling?

Or is it more likely that the customer has a better understanding of the product they are being sold?

Is there a third option worth discussing?


Since We’re Talking About Spelling

Is is Schmalfelddt, or Schmalfeldtt? Your many legal pleadings filed in Maryland, Wisconsin, Illinois and South Carolina (easily found at PACER.ORG by any truly enterprising reporter in search of a great story)  leave no small amount of doubt as to the spelling of your legal name.

Oh, and…



Do Not Let This Man Adopt Animals

In 2015, he abandoned two dogs named Raven and Shiloh when he moved from Maryland to Wisconsin.

In 2017, after leaving his forever retirement home at the strong suggestion of NINJANUNS to relocate to Iowa, he acquired a cat named Boris and a dog named Jake. It is believed by many that they are now in a sack at the bottom of the Mississippi River along with a certain clockwork urn that didn’t make the trip to South Kackalacky and the Balloon Boy.

Speaking of Balloon Boy then there was Onyx (remember Onyx? It’s a song about Onyx…) the $1500 Show Cat.


That makes four…

Onyx was replaced by Monty the Collusion Cat, and made into one of the stupidest DOA Twitter bits that DUMBFUCK has ever conceived.

Monty was billed on the ill-fated Facebook page as the future producer-to-be for morning titan Bill Mathews of KGYN (why the name change? It’s not his town…they don’t know him there…and he’ll be very lucky if they never do).

But as has become the predictable outcome…Monty never reached his destination.

Now we have Thor and Loki.  No doubt these new animals (and why has scared, hiding-in-silence-under-the-porch puppy Bill Schmalfeldt developed such a recent affinity for pussies? Just Asking Questions™) were named by his insipid fiance Inflate-A-Boy (“Flnucnk YUBU, Kneumbner!!”) Kelly.

I’m sure we all remember the contents of her now-protected library of Deviant Art images, including some highly explicit examples of Asgardian incest pornography.  Clearly our pal Bill Mathews, the station manager and morning shock-jock at the Big Talker 1210-AM in Guymon approves of such filth…silence gives consent and all that.

But back to my point: that’s five abandoned animals in three years.  Who wants to bet Thor and Loki are gone by Christmas?

Someone clearly HATES changing the litter box.



And Guess What, DUMBFUCK?

Oh, how I remember the LOLSUITS and blog posts, peppered with your complaints that no one would let you comment on their sites anymore! You had a CONSTITUTIONAL RIGHT, GODDAMN IT!! to defend yourself from the consequences of your lies.

Obviously, you feel differently now.  Other than the political bent of the person being censored, what’s changed?

I guess all Alex Jones has to do is follow the Schmalfeldt-Mathews Ban Avoidance Method: get another email address and sign up again. I think you were up over 200 Twitter handles at last count, am I close?

This is an opportune moment, though, to offer yet another reminder of why you were, why you are, and why you always shall be – WRONG:

  1. Denying you the right to post or comment at DailyKos (where you were banned twice for insulting protected classes) wasn’t a violation of your First Amendment rights. It was you getting banned for being an asshole.
  2. Denying you the right to post or comment at The Examiner (where you were banned for behaving unprofessionally toward your commenters) wasn’t an infringement of your First Amendment rights. It was you getting banned for being an asshole.
  3. Denying you the right to comment at Hogewash! was also not an infringement of your First Amendment rights. My guess is it was a result of you behaving like an asshole.
  4. Denying you the right to comment at Sonoran Conservative was also not an infringement of your First Amendment rights. It was just you suffering the consequences of being an asshole.
  5. placing your comments in moderation here at Thinking Man’s Zombie is not an infringement of your First Amendment rights. It was just a response to you being an asshole.

You visit almost every day, but you never comment anymore…are you really trying to get on with your life in peace? I don’t think so.  But clearly that reporter does. You’re quite the bullshit artist with new friends who haven’t figured you out yet, and we all know it.

Anyway, have a great…life?… out there in the wilds of the Dust Bowl.  I hope a twister doesn’t take your trailer unless I’m there to see it.

And take my advice: keep a good distance from the real world. There’s zombies out there.




So we’ll be able to post video of you doing live radio right next to sworn court statements saying that you retired on disability from a progressive neurological disorder that NEVER EVER EVER gets better, because you were unable to manage to speak on the podcasts you were supposed to be doing.

And we’ll be able to post video clips of you in the studio without the wheelchair that you claimed to be confined to.

This is going to be GREAT!