Consideration

Turn on the oven to 375°

Take some flour, some salt and some baking soda.  Mix them in a bowl and put them aside for a bit.

In a big mixing bowl, put a couple sticks of butter, some white sugar, some brown sugar, and some vanilla extract.  Whip that up until it’s creamy.

Drop in a couple eggs and mix that up.  Now it’s a little runny.

Start folding in the the dry stuff in the bowl that you had set aside.  It starts to thicken up and get – well, what other word can you use? – doughy.

Now stir in a bag of chocolate chips.  Maybe a bag and a half.  Some nuts, if you like that sort of thing.

Get your cookie sheet out, and drop spoonfuls of that dough on there and bake them up for 9-10 minutes.

Try not to gorge the raw dough, them raw eggs will do you in.

What comes out of the oven?  I’ll tell you what doesn’t come out of the oven:

  • Flour does not come out of the oven
  • Salt does not come out of the oven
  • Baking soda does not come out of the oven
  • Butter does not come out of the oven
  • White sugar does not come out of the oven
  • Brown does not come out of the oven
  • Vanilla extract does not come out of the oven
  • Eggs do not come out of the oven
  • Chocolate chips do not come out of the oven
  • Nuts do not come out of the oven

(Those last two may be a bit of a metaphorical stretch)

What you have are Tollhouse cookies.

You don’t taste flour, salt, baking soda, butter, sugar, brown sugar, vanilla extract or eggs. You do taste chocolate and nuts, but they’re integral to the cookie, right?

You don’t taste that stuff, but guess what?

It’s in there.

 

 

Like(9)Dislike(0)

Wait…What?

What just happened?

OooOOOoooOOOoooh!!

Scawwy. I so scawwed.

I will blog what I want to blog.

I will tweet what I want to tweet.

And I know that Buzz Punko-Makes-Ladies-Blow-Chunko will see it all. Because he’s certainly not looking for me.

Hey! Quit bothering me in there!  I see you not leaving me alone!
Hey! Quit bothering me in there! I see you not leaving me alone!

Oh, wait – I have a new follower on Twitter!

Even a ridiculous, sand-pantied, skirt-hiking runaway pussy DUMBFUCK knows that RIDICULE IS NOT A FUCKING TORT, any more than BUTTHURT is.  And automated emails from third parties (like WordPress pingbacks or Twitter notifications) are NOT contact, whether a weeping, sand-filled, nutshuffling cockfaced pussy comes looking for it or not.

So, Zombies, always remember – you come looking?  You get what you get.

What the hell is he gonna do? File a RICO lawsuit or something?

I’d like to see it.

Like(8)Dislike(0)