The Leading Cause of Loveless Marriages in the U.S.?

OBAMACARE.

It looks like there’s a balloon animal in South Carolina that can’t afford health insurance under Obamacare anymore.

Actually, it reads very much like xhe couldn’t afford it in the first place. “Thank you for making it impossible for me to afford to get insurance by cutting off the subsidies.”

Guess what?

If you can’t afford something without someone else’s help to pay for it, YOU CAN’T AFFORD IT!

I guess xhe will have to find some other way to afford the insurance to fix that vandalized cemetery of a pecker wrecker xhe calls a mouth, and whatever other maladies might plague xer.

I know!  Maybe xhe could find some sap and convince him to marry xer to get on xis health insurance. It would take a real idiot to fall for such an obvious scam, though.

But even if xe did marry xer, the scam would only work if xe wasn’t a pauper and a cheapskate who would rather burn xis money on cheapjack scootypuffs than take care of xis plasticene playmate.

So remember – make good choices!

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And Who Better To Recognize A Toothless Threat Than DUMBFUCK Bill Schmalfeldt?

0 for VIII, anyone?

Let me guess…some of your best friends are Jews, too!  Just like anti-Semite racist woman-hater (thank God you’re just a pecker wrecker sockpuppet!) Bill Schmalfeldt?

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Self Awareness Fail Number Zero for Eight

‘Nuff said.

UPDATE:

On behalf of the Zombie Horde, fuck you, you toothless, cowardly, lying, racist, cocksnogging balloonfucker.

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Pack Your Bags, DUMBFUCK!

Motion for Reconsideration is DEEEEEEEEE-NIED!

No one will be showing anything to anyone over Skype!

I guess we will be seeing him in Westminster! Whether in a courtroom or a holding cell is entirely up to him.

OOPSIE POOPSIE!

UPDATE: The pro se Plaintiff has EVEN MOAR DETAIL at Hogewash!

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It Is A Sobering Thought…

…to consider that if you measure the cosmic probability of Bill Schmalfeldt prevailing at trial next week against the likelihood of a TOTAL ECLIPSE OF THE SUN OCCURRING WHILE THE TRIAL IS IN PROGRESS, Schmalfeldt still comes out on the losing end.

He should have taken his own advice.

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Let’s Fisk Again, Like We Did Last Summer

STUPID Lying Motherfucker Bill Schmalfeldt left a comment at the Artisan Craft Blog yesterday which is deserving of some special attention…

You obviously do not have a copy of the first e-mail I sent to Ms. Hinckley. I, however, do.

Hey, what a coincidence! So do I! Although the copy I was provided had the images redacted, because most people (present company excluded) had more respect for your wife’s dignity than you did.

The one where I wrote, “As your husband was one of the people suggesting my wife’s death was a scam I was trying to pull on people, I feel you deserve to see this picture. If it gets published anywhere, I will know who did it as it hasn’t been published anywhere else.” A normal person would read that as an instruction to NOT publish the picture. But look at who spread the picture around…

No, a normal person would read that as the weak roar of a toothless lion who already knows that once he presses the SEND button, that picture is gonna get published, and that lion is not interested in PREVENTING its publication but is in fact ACTIVELY FACILITATING IT. And in telegraphing that he knows there is absolutely nothing he can do to stop it, and nothing he can do to anyone (like me) who chooses to publish it.

Oh, wait… the COPS sent it to Grady!
No, it was the authorities in Carroll County! THOSE bastards sent the photo to Grady.

Wrong and wrong.  No one sent it to Grady.

Someone sent it to me. The email said Mort in Maryland. I think that name might have been fake.

Grady was the first one to publish it.

Wrong again.

Now, because karma, Grady no longer has a wife.

Oh, please…please expand on the unique knowledge that you have of Grady’s divorce, all while trying to explain how HE’S STALKING YOU, YOU STUPID LYING MOTHERFUCKER.

The only difference? Mine did not choose to leave me.

Janina and Janice would like a word.

Shame on you all.

Your game, your rules.  You first.

 

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ALL 4 QUARTERS??

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

That’s fucking rich, coming from the guy who’s never made it past the first possession, to continue the stupid metaphor. Meanwhile…

 

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Yes, Marvin…

…take this shit seriously.

This is not a game, and if you aren’t careful, perhaps three and a half years from now you will suffer the wrath of Preston-Schmalfeldt (*snerk*) just as deeply as I have.

And let me tell you, having this much fun laughing at idiots every single day can be exhausting.

But someone has to.

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