Yes, DUMBFUCK, There Is Ample Proof

  1. You have not denied that you moved, only demanded proof that is not required.
  2. Perhaps you missed the posted clock running on your deadline to disprove t what our anonymous sources told us before we simply assumed it was true, but that has never made a difference to you when you were the one demanding answers and making unfounded assumptions.

There was a clock, and you missed your deadline.  Our assumptions are therefore proved correct and accurate.

#YourGame
#YourRules
#KickingYourAss

#FuckYou

P.S. When you do file your change of address notification with the court, your lie of omission will be laid bare for the world.  Just like all the rest.

 

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Regrets, He’s Had a Few

Regrets? You mean he’s not showing up Friday?

Gee, I wonder what’s happened since Saturday?

Is Badass Bill once more hiking up his skirts? Sure seems like it!

Will the hills of South Carolina come alive with the sickly tang of Brave Sir William’s river of fear pee? I think they will!

All is proceeding as I have foreseen, and even if he is only pretending and actually does the smart thing and shows up in Greensboro. I PREDICT:

  1. He will shoot himself in the foot merely by showing up; and
  2. He will forget (or ignore, depending on perspective) an opportunity to do something reasonably smart for himself.

In any case, no matter what he does Friday, he loses. Because of course, DUMBFUCK.

Dance, Monkey! DAAAAAAAAANCE!!

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Uh…NOPE

Nobody is laughing at a disabled person.

We’re laughing at YOU.

Here’s Sonoran Conservative, specifically – laughing at YOU.

UPDATE – MOAR POINTAGE from MOAR-GANNA!

EVEN MOAR UPDATE – the mockification continues (SWIDT, Fifi?) at the Artisan Craft Blog.

When the rest of my Team Free Speech pals get around to joining in the pointage, laughery and mockification, I will link them too!

You see, appearing remotely via Skype is not a right. It is a privilege.

It is a privilege which you saw fit to abuse. Now that privilege has been withdrawn from you.

Too bad, so sad. Boo hoo hoo.

Now, you have been ordered to appear in person in a Maryland court to show cause why you should not be held in contempt for your abuse of the privilege of appearing via Skype and your alleged violation of court rules prohibiting the use of electronic devices in court and the recording of court proceedings.

Now you want to bitch about your rights “as a disabled person?”

Here’s what you want to do.

  • Make a reservation at an ADA compliant hotel near the ADA compliant courthouse in Carroll County, Maryland
  • Pack an ADA compliant suitcase (be sure to include an ADA compliant toothbrush);
  • Call an ADA compliant taxi (perhaps an ADA compliant forklift and an ADA compliant flatbed truck would be better)
  • Have the ADA compliant mode of transport take you to the ADA compliant train station
  • Buy a ticket for an ADA compliant train
  • Get on the ADA compliant train
  • Get off the ADA compliant train at the ADA compliant train station in Baltimore
  • Call another ADA compliant taxi
  • Have this ADA compliant taxi take you to the ADA compliant hotel in Carroll County
  • Sleep off the arduous effects of your ADA compliant journey
  • Call yet another ADA compliant conveyance to haul your greasy-moobed sack of flapping beetusflesh from the ADA compliant hotel to the ADA compliant courthouse in Carroll County
  • Don’t forget that toothbrush. And your checkbook
  • Make your way to the ADA compliant courtroom where your show cause hearing is scheduled in the ADA compliant courthouse
  • Make sure you leave your electronic devices in the ADA compliant hotel room
  • If you do bring a phone, make sure you POWER THAT MOTHERFUCKER DOWN before entering the ADA compliant courtroom where you have been ordered to appear
  • Make your best case that you are a simple unfrozen disabled caveman pro se, and all these court rules and procedures THAT YOU WERE TOLD TO FOLLOW are strange and confusing
  • Enjoy your ADA compliant holding cell.

You DUMBFUCK.

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Good Evening, DUMBFUCK!

I foresee that this will NOT proceed as DUMBFUCK has foreseen.

In fact, I predict – nay, I ASSURE you, dear Zombies – that this is going to blow up in his face.

Off hand, I can think of eight reasons why LOLSUIT VII – The Fat and the Furryious won’t get to trial.

If it gets to trial (it won’t), there are five more reasons it will fail there.

The main reason is, of course, “Plaintiff William M. Schmalfeldt, Sr.”

As to the rest, we don’t educate the monkey when we can PLM instead.

And we will PLM.  A whole lot.

While we watch Know-It-All Barrister Bill take it up the tailpipe.

YET AGAIN.

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Definitely Fake

Really? He’s going to farm out his wrath to the balloon?

How lovely that he’s fabricated a new set of skirts to cower behind!

Is there a bigger cunt move he could make?  I’m coming up empty.

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To An ADJUDICATED CYBERSTALKER like PodcastPair…

“proper response” means you delete your blog so the shitsniffing balloonfucker doesn’t publish the divorce and bankruptcy information of someone who hasn’t been online for almost two years because the ADJUDICATED CYBERSTALKER lacks the sack and the skills to come straight at you. #Extortion

#ComeAtMeBalloonFucker

Oh, and let’s not forget…calling someone a “cyberthug?”

Them’s fightin’ words. So sayeth DUMBFUCK his own self.

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Let’s Get This on the Record and Out of the Way Right Now

During yesterday’s wonderful monkey dance by the Great Weeping Pussy of Clinton, Iowa, this tweet appeared:

No one who has observed DUMBFUCK for more than a weekend or so is unfamiliar with his distaste for anyone who sticks their booger vault into someone else’s business.  Why who could forget the many times DUMBFUCK himself stuck his own mucus repository into Aaron Walker’s business?  If there is anything one can glean from those episodes, one thing is clear:  Bill Schmalfeldt has nothing but contempt for people who play a lot of video games.

I guess it’s a good thing he doesn’t know anybody like that.

But I digress.

This coward in Iowa will not put up with people who go and insert themselves into conversations where they haven’t been invited to reply!

Say, what’s my Twitter handle doing in those tweets?

Oops.

I should amend my prior statement.

This coward in Iowa will not put up with people who go and insert themselves into conversations where they HAVE been invited to reply, but who then proceed to thoroughly embarrass and cause to monkeydance the punkass shitsniffing cocksnogger who did the inviting. 

Because giant, sand-stuffed pussy.

But really, DUMBFUCK has a long and storied history of whining like a worthless bitch at the following times:

  1. when people stick their booger vaults where he doesn’t want them stuck;
  2. when people call him out for sticking his snotbank where he has no right to stick it;
  3. when people decide to engage the Amazon Vagina Warrior Princess du Jour behind whose skirts he is currently cowering; and
  4. any other time.

So when this tweet showed up in my notifications…

 

I thought it was interesting, someone sticking their booger vault into something that was none of their affair, to paraphrase an idiot. Unless of course that pussy went begging to his new Warrior Princess for aid and succor. But Big, Bad, Brave Billy would never do that just for someone he knows he could curbstomp, would he?

“NOW YOU STOP RESPONDING TO TWEETS WHERE I MENTION YOU OR I’M GOING TO CURBSTOMP YOUR ASS!!!

Right.

I’m confident you’ll figure out the technique by the sixth or seventh try. Will you be leaning on your cane or sitting in your walker?

He says he has a phone number.  He never calls.

He says he has an address.  He never writes and never drops by.

It’s not a tough riddle to solve…that puddle of urine isn’t going to mop itself up, is it, DUMBFUCK?

In any case, @redheadturkey was not part of the conversation.  Had not even been mentioned before appearing UNINVITED.  It’s the kind of thing that sand-packed weeping vaginas like the Coward of Clinton County simply will not countenance.

But what’s done is done. It’s on the record. It’s archived. When DUMBFUCK Bill Schmalfeldt makes CaptiveNurseReno his newest sword and shield, and cries “Look how they treat her…just for being fool enough to fall in love with me! (or words to that effect)” remember:

Reno/@redheadturkey CRASHED THIS PARTY of her own free will.  No one had spoken to her or about her…except DUMBFUCK. She stepped up and invited upon herself everything that may follow. I hope she’s smarter than her idiot boyfriend and knows better than to blame someone else for what she just stepped into.

And a last word of caution:  The Cowardly Lion will blame somebody, and who’s going to be handy in the Deep South?

Bless your heart, darlin’. Bless your li’l ole heart.

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Some Questions Are Answered Before They Are Even Asked

Why would DUMBFUCK move away from his hometown after just a couple of months?


Oh. Well, I guess that explains it. People know him there.

And he got fired.

Like Bob said, those many years ago…”That poor girl.”

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Good Morning, DUMBFUCK!


Better off than whom? Gail?

Agreed. In life or in death, in her choice of spouse, in her place in the hereafter, in any possible measure…John Hoge’s wife was, is, and ever shall be better off than Bill Schmalfeldt’s Captive Nurse.

On the other hand, there are not many people about whom it could be said that their life on Earth got better the moment they left it. Congratulations, Gail. She may have thought true love and slavery were the same thing, but ultimately that’s down to the sociopathic narcissism of He Who Will Not Be Muzzled because Principles And Shit (though not necessarily in that order).

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So I Guess The Great White Plagiarism Hunter Has Lost His Mojo

Used to be, not so long ago, that if John Hoge posted something on the Internet, you could count on a DUMBFUCK to stick that post into Google and call John a plagiarist for repeating a joke.

(Remind me to tell you the one about the lardass cripple who hired a flatbed truck and a forklift to haul him to court – it’s a really good one!)

Recently though, DUMBFUCK seems to have lost the knack for searching the Internet for thing other people have said.

Over at Cabin Boy Unread (no), a commenter named “Bob” took issue with the whinging that DUMBFUCK was aiming at Jason Chaffetz over his assertion that it might come down to a choice between paying a premium for the insurance or picking up that sweet iPhone.

Bob pointed out that long before Rep. Chaffetz spoke out on Sunday, President Lightbringer was saying essentially the same thing:

As you can see, DUMBFUCK’S response was as filled with grace and charm as anything else he’s ever written.  ALWAYS WITH THE BUTT STUFF…and especially so when the commenter in question shares a name with his monoplacental twin!  I wonder if there’s some deeper meaning there…

But it seems…what’s the word?…QUEER! that a DUMBFUCK so skilled at finding quotes on the Internet would go begging for help in this instance, when it’s right out in front of God and EVERYBODY to find.

Copy. Paste. Search. Result.

5 seconds, tops.

Whoo!  Somebody get me a cold drink, I am exhausted.

UPDATE:  After deleting a comment wherein “Bob” provided the linkage DUMBFUCK requested, “Bob” reposted the video. Sadly the archive does not retain the image, but I feel confident it is the same video posted above.

So now we have a record when DUMBFUCK deletes this comment too, during work hours at KMCN-FM.

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