Good Afternoon, DUMBFUCK!

Hey, look at my “new” book!

The cover art was stolen from this book…

But never mind that, review my book!!

Never mind the bad reviews, just buy the book. You can’t trust those bad reviews, even if there is no other kind. They’re all liars, I’ve deleted almost all of the evidence of what they’re talking about, as far as I know.

Just buy the book, trust me. You’ll wish you hadn’t, but there’s a bottle of Johnnie Walker Red calling to me. And I’m in the mood to buy and abandon Scootypuff #3.


I Thought DUMBFUCK Would Be Right On Top Of This


After years of debate, scientists have confirmed that [the seventh planet from the Sun] does, in fact, emit foul smells.

[S]pectroscopic observations have uncovered hydrogen sulfide seeping from the planet’s cloud tops.

A global team, led by Patrick Irwin from the University of Oxford, dissected infrared light from the ice giant and found the noxious gas (which gives rotten eggs their distinctive scent) swirling in its upper atmosphere.

Their long-sought evidence was published this week in the journal Nature Astronomy.

“If an unfortunate human were ever to descend through [the] clouds,” Irwin said, “they would be met with very unpleasant and odiferous conditions.”

Luckily, a quick death would save you from the stench.

That’s right, kids…

Uranus smells like farts.

I denounce myself.


Why Am I Not Surprised?

If you want to see pervert Bill Schmalfeldt participating in the sexualization of an African- American toddler, just visit his Twitter timeline to see his most recent retweet:

Or, don’t. You don’t need to see that crap.  Just take my word for it.


Just Trying To Do My Part!

I want to take this moment to reveal  that well-known internet stalker Bill Schmalfeldt has published yet another book!

This man who once lived under the protection of NINJANUNS in Wisconsin, trying to re-connect with his Catholic heritage while simultaneously posting photographs of his ass on Twitter, would like to promote his book in which he calls upon his deep and thorough knowledge of Scripture, which even the Devil can use for his purposes, to indict, insult and attack Americans he cannot understand.

Remember that Bill Schmalfeldt, Progressive Warrior, retweets others saying we should love our pets, while conveniently forgetting that he has abandoned no fewer than five animals (three dogs, two cats, six if you count Balloon Animals) during his travels of the last four years or so.

Remember that Bill Schmalfeldt, Tolerant Liberal, is the author of tweets, blog posts, radio skits and podcasts which include the rape of children, racism, misogyny, anti-Semitism, anti-Christian bigotry, general hatred and an appalling failure to understand or apply the basic principles of the English language to the written and spoken word.

Remember that Bill Schmalfeldt, passionate romantic, who admitted that the most wonderful thing about his soulmate was that she made him “aspire to be decent” (I shudder to speculate what he was that he though being “decent” would be some quantum improvement), was blogging for butthurt and checking email at the moment his beloved First Date Soulmate gasped her final poisoned breath in 2015.

Remember that Bill Schmalfeldt, prolific self-published author, has had several books removed from the digital bookshelves thanks to his impossibly liberal interpretation of Copyright law and the Fair Use Doctrine, to wit: “Anything I steal from you is Fair Use, anything you steal from me is FEDRUHL CRAHMS! Because I said so.” So if you intend to purchase this book for anything other than evidence of likely wrongdoing by the author, better hurry. Also, shame on you. You would probably get more edification reading a treatise on the proper methodologies for the slaughter of beef cattle – at least you wind up with tasty steaks.  You might even get to use a chain saw!

So, this is me, spreading the word as requested: Bill Schmalfeldt has a new book, and if you buy it, you deserve every bit of pointage, laughery and mockification that comes your way.

I’m sure Ted Bundy wrote a memoir that has more socially redeeming value, why not try to find that instead?


Bill Schmalfeldt Retweeted This

I’m sure Shiloh, Raven, Jake, Boris and Onyx would like a word.


Do You Want More Trump?

Because this is how you get more Trump.

I can’t decide if Useful Idiot Bill Schmalfeldt is more Useful or more Idiot…guess it’s another opportunity to embrace the power of ‘AND!’


Everything Old (And Stupid, Pointless, Bound To Fail)…

…is New (and Stupid, Pointless, Bound to Fail) Again!


Please welcome the all-same-old, all-stupid, all-poop-obsessed, racist, bigoted, anti-Semite, misogynist, stolen valor (boy, I hope the PD at KDSN read those posts), hypocritical, pet abandoning, almost was a radio host again until he started insulting potential listeners before he got on the air, lying motherfucker Bill Schmalfeldt back to Twitter as @TrumpThumpCast.

At least for a couple days, anyway.

Have we reached 250 handles yet? Or are we not getting excited again until he nears 300 handles, which should be right around the 4th of July, I think?

I wonder why this blog keeps getting hits from Denison, Iowa?  It never used to…perhaps someone is someone stuck there without a job or the means to get back to South Carolina? Someone who just wants to be left alone and live his life, if only he could break this addiction to butthurt?

What a shame…(not really)…