Good Morning, DUMBFUCK!

No secret that you will never have the chance to seek discovery of any kind, much less from WordPress.

Also no secret that you are too fucking stupid to figure out why.

Like(10)Dislike(0)

Author: Paul Krendler

The Thinking Man's Zombie

66 thoughts on “Good Morning, DUMBFUCK!”

  1. A DUMBFUCK should be much more concerned about how he's going to explain away his recent perjury.

    But he won't. That's why I love him so.

    Like(5)Dislike(0)
    1. he can't, but his contortions and twisting Bill-logic before the court , trying to keep his fat ass out of jail for contempt should be HILARIOUS!

      Like(3)Dislike(0)
      1. Yeah, if you people could get Customs and Border Enforcement to stop being such dickheads, I'd be there to watch!

        Like(3)Dislike(0)
    2. He has to ignore what is pressing right in front of his face. The cognitive dissonance is just too much. He HAS to keep repeating to himself that he's gonna WIN! And he knows he's gonna get slapped in one way or another with the whole contempt of court thing, let alone the perjury he did about those admissions. So he has to create his bubble.

      Guess it's too bad we keep poking it with a pin, huh? lololol

      Like(3)Dislike(0)
    3. But will you love him as much when his lard ass is consuming three hots and a cot in the county lockup?

      Like(3)Dislike(0)
      1. Out of sight, out of mind.

        OTOH, if that ever does come to pass, there will be a new countdown UP clock, I can guarantee.

        IT HAS BEEN xxx DAYS SINCE DUMBFUCK TASTED FREEDOM.

        Like(8)Dislike(0)
        1. And maybe one for

          IT HAS BEEN xxx DAYS SINCE DUMBFUCK TASTED COCK.

          But it would only have a minute hand......

          Like(1)Dislike(0)
        2. TOLF, I'm not sure how that counter would be any different if HZIC posted it right now...

          Like(1)Dislike(0)
      2. Maybe even more. I imagine that seeing a lulcow blaming Hoge and Krendler for his inability to sit without wincing would be the most breathtakingly beautiful thing of all.

        Like(6)Dislike(0)
  2. I'm trying to figure out how to be there for the 28th myself. I wonder if w can fix us up a mini-Kimberfest? I know he won't be able to do anything on the same scale at this short notice, but last year was fantastic!

    Like(5)Dislike(0)
    1. Oh man-

      You're talking short notice. NTTAWWT (Hi Brett!).

      Kimberfest '17 is slated for the fall. I'm waiting on the court(s) before settling the dates. You guys really want a intermediate event? Short-notice air travel is more difficult when school gets out for summer vacation- Just sayin'-

      BTW, one of you (it's not mine) left a blue sports coat on the bus we took to Iowa. Contact me at the Sooper Sekrit site so I can get it back to you.

      Thanks

      Like(6)Dislike(0)
  3. "A vocal style that compares favorably to the sound of a blender full of gravel."

    Is that REALLY a compliment?

    Like(4)Dislike(0)
      1. "A voice like Whitney Houston! But to be fair, Whitney has been dead for five years."

        Like(4)Dislike(0)
        1. Are you sure it wasn't Janice Joplin? She's been dead much longer.

          Like(2)Dislike(0)
        2. I see your point. Once a certain time has passed, it's all the same.

          Like(2)Dislike(0)
        3. "The gruff, grating roar of an urban construction zone, replete with jackhammers, acetylene torches, rivet guns, angry diesel backhoes, catcalls and wolf whistles...just not at her."

          Like(2)Dislike(0)
      2. I was pondering something between the exhaust of a '77 Fiat, and an $8 blender working on 2 cups of ice.

        Like(2)Dislike(0)
  4. "She does a dead-on impression of a Rolls-Royce Pegasus turbofan. You know, the Harrier jump jet engine.

    ... That's not what she was going for? Singing 'Moon River,' you say?

    Oh."

    Like(4)Dislike(0)
    1. HEY, you gotta admit, being able to mimic the sound of nails on a chalkboard vocally is quite a skill...

      didn't say it was a USEFUL skill, but it IS a skill none the less.

      Like(3)Dislike(0)
        1. D. L. Sayers; I can't take credit. But it seemed apt.

          Of course I once malapropped it by substituting "prostitute" for "destitute" ...

          Like(2)Dislike(0)
  5. "The dulcet tones of a twister ripping through a trailer park!"

    Like(5)Dislike(0)
  6. "A lilting, melodious cackle not heard in these parts since the end of the Salem witch trials"

    Like(5)Dislike(0)
  7. A mellifluous mumbling, like the rumble and grumble of take-out tacos making their way to the colon of a three-hundred-plus pound argument for retroactive abortion.

    Like(8)Dislike(0)
  8. An "In-Sink-erator" dealing with a jar of rancid mayonnaise; jar and lid included.

    Like(4)Dislike(0)
        1. Yes, but with what sort of consistency inside a garbage disposal banging off a rancid mayo lid?

          Like(4)Dislike(0)
  9. Like a bovine with Mad Cow bellowing out her anguish and pain....but like really, really off key.

    Like(4)Dislike(0)
  10. The incessant screeching of a murder of crows in a rampage, feasting on rotting whale blubber.

    Like(8)Dislike(0)
  11. Such a melodic sound that the listener would wish they were rendered completely deaf rather than having to hear it again.

    Like(4)Dislike(0)
  12. Ahhh, the sounds that emanate from her mouth remind me of the combined sounds of hard braking disc brakes with no pads left with the sounds of a screaming 5 year girl.

    That is what I call auditory enlightenment.

    Like(3)Dislike(0)
  13. such so called singing should be saved for posterity and used only to force hostage situations to an early end.
    as the broacast of such sounds would surely bring any hostage taker out quickly begging for it to end.

    however the Geneva convention against torture would prohibit its use after the first try.

    Like(2)Dislike(0)
  14. The sweet, melodic tones of cats fucking in a ball of barbed wire.

    Like(5)Dislike(0)
  15. The lilting tone of a mortally wounded hog, slipping on its own entrails . . .

    Like(6)Dislike(0)
  16. A room full of crackheads choking on their own tongues ... at the same time.

    Like(4)Dislike(0)
  17. CDC, FEMA, EPA, and DOE/NNSA regulations require prenotification of any vocal stylings, long enough in advance to assemble the necessary resources to minimize loss of life and restore public safety. 42 U.S.C. §§ 2011-2021, 2022-2286i, and 2296a-2297h-13 provide severe criminal and civil penalties for failure to comply.

    Like(5)Dislike(0)
  18. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cOAU1o49kj8

    The inflatable neck bladder really allows for some projection.

    Like(2)Dislike(0)

Comments are closed.