Good Afternoon, DUMBFUCK!

Okay, so to recap – making accusations without proof is bad again.

In that case, does anyone remember when KMCN-FM the MAC 94.7 host Broadway Bill Schmalfeldt begged and begged like the puling pussy he is for someone, anyone to take down the website that someone started?

Does anyone remember when he started accusing me of being behind it? Does anyone recall that fat jackass providing even one bit of proof?

And of course it was him, not me, who outed Vinnie Virgintino, Thomas Puzo Sr., Miriam Lazewatsky and dog trainers various and sundry up and down the Eastern seaboard? (Guess what, DUMBFUCK? Just because you delete your fuck-ups does not mean the INTERNET IS NOT STILL FOREVER.)

It was him, not me, who determined that Howard Earl was Jerry Fletcher was Chris Heather was Jeremy Kinsey was Robin Causey was Paul Krendler was Eric Schultz was Owain Pennilyn was John Hoge IV was Grace the San Francisco hairdresser was Ashterah was the Dread Pirate Zombie was Asherahresearch was Laura Ashley was Ashley Wilkes was Wilkes Chamberlain was Richard Chamberlain was Jason Bourne was Matt Damon was Damon Runyon was Ring Lardner was James Garner was Jim Rockford was Rocky Balboa was Snake Plissken.


It was him, not not me, who spread disgusting deathbed photos of his so-called soulmate, the best woman he ever met (out of maybe 6 total, not including the Japanese whatever-you-want-to-call-him), and that’s how much respect he has for her, to spew that photo all over the internet.

What about those photos of someone allegedly abusing a cadaver that he says that I sent him?  Does anyone recall the proof that it was me?

And all those times he has accused me of being the person behind the creation of, and multiple guffaw-inducing updates to his personal page at Encyclopedia Dramatica?  Does anyone remember him ever offering a shred of proof?

And the many times he has accused me of being some guy from Palatine, Illinois, without ever providing a single shred of proof?

And last year, when Agent Starling took time from her busy schedule to drive to the Palace of the Ninjanuns in St. Francis, Wisconsin to take a photo of the car he bought, after YEARS of lying about being unable to drive because EXACERBATED PARKINSON’S or some such bullshit, and DUMBFUCK Broadway Bill Schmalfeldt posted this lie:

Here’s a hint, for a turdsniffing moron: it wasn’t me, it wasn’t a car, and it didn’t have Illinois plates.

I know who Agent Starling was, I know what he was driving, and I know what state the plates were from.

I challenge lying crapnugget & sandpacked pussy Broadway Bill Schmalfeldt, minimum wage midday host at KMCN-FM in Clinton Iowa, to publish that picture.

I know he never will though. He doesn’t have any such picture because it doesn’t exist, and because he’s a lying piece of shit, and a credit to the character of the no-account radio station who hired him.

Again, that radio station is KMCN- FM the MAC 94.7 in Clinton Iowa, where they play everything, with the possible exception of THE KIDDIE PORN HOMOSEXUAL BOY SCOUT PARODIES BILL SCHMALFELDT CREATED AND TRIES TO SELL ON AMAZON.



Those two links to Amazon, and the titles?  Those are called “proof.”

Because making accusations without proof is bad again.

Or maybe it’s only bad to make accusations about Broadass Bill Schmalfeldt, the lying pussy behind the mike from 1 – 5 afternoons at KMCN-FM in Clinton, Iowa.

Maybe it’s only okay when he does it to others.

Which he does all the time.



Author: Paul Krendler

The Thinking Man's Zombie

19 thoughts on “Good Afternoon, DUMBFUCK!”

  1. I hope Bill "Doc" "Fakinsons" Schmalfeldt of MAC 94.7FM gets canned on Friday if only so I can win the pool.

    PS - don't forget that the only reason he had a "soulmate" (whose pictures of her on her deathbed he freely shared as well as detailed descriptions of how she urinated all over herself) was because he stole her from his brother. Because Bill Schmalfeldt of MAC 94.7FM in Clinton, IA doesn't care about anyone but himself and whatever immediate need he has- and will lie about ANYTHING from caring about a "soulmate" to a progressive neurological disorder like Parkinsons in order to get it.

  2. Wait a minute, all the evidence I saw indicated the the proprietor of " " was the one complaining--he certainly advertised it every chance he could--about it.

  3. Q. Why did @asideofbacon never see those tweets from the Deranged Cyberstalker Bill Schmalfeldt @FatManPodcast in her Twitter mentions?



    1. Of course!

      First the block, THEN the response.

      Internet Tuff Guy Handbook, page 1.

      1. Hey! He *was* wearing his gen-you-wine tuff guy Pleather jacket when when he blocked her.

    2. The old "Tweet from behind the block move". I thought that was reserved for mewling little pussies. Oh...........

      1. He is such a cowardly piece of garbage.

        And, he calls me "Bacon Girl" – I'm pretty sure I'm not the "girl" in this equation.

  4. If you want a laugh Mr. Fakinsons is running a pink floyd set where he spouts of commonly known facts if you've ever listened to pink floyd as if they are SUPAH SEKRIT ARKANE KNOWLEGEZ!!1!one!1!!111 like a complete retard.

  5. I can imagine....

    "Did you know that Roger Waters played BASS GUITAR for Pink Floyd?!?! ZOMG!!!11!1!"

    Freaking fool.

  6. He is stupid that sometimes it hurts.

    Bill "Fakinsons" Schmalfeldt on MAC 94.7 FM in Clinton, IA had a great moment of "I am completely clueless about the world" moment today. While a song from The Who was in play the GS-13 opened his cockholster to lament "so many great songs have been appropriated into commercials" talking about how car dealers and movies use too many great songs for their ads.

    Completely. Utterly. Clueless.

    Because it is something he doesn't understand.

    When you are marketing a product to a particular segment you want them to be able to identify with a product as much as possible to compel them to buy. So of course Nissan is going to use the refrain "the best I ever had" to appeal to boomers and older gen-x'ers who want a practical car, or Baba O'Riley with Mazda whose melodic qualities cater to the same age demographic's playful size ("zoom zoom!"). If I recall correctly Led Zep and AC/DC have been used many times for higher end sports cards to convey how much of a badass they are on the road.

    Mr. Fakinsons lacks the practicality to buy a Nissan, the "badassery" to buy a sports car (LMAO!) or the money to buy either, so it is understandable why he just wouldn't understand the "appropriation" of songs into car commercials.

    Maybe if a car company makes and markets a car that is targeted to borderline-retarded spineless sand-packed pussies who are broke, he might finally get it. I still have my doubts.

    1. Maybe if a car company makes and markets a car that is targeted to borderline-retarded spineless sand-packed pussies who are broke, he might finally get it.

      Is Yugo still in business?

      1. Not a Yugo, a Reliant Robin. The only car unstable enough for Bill Fakinsons Schmalfeldt.

    2. What song would cater to that very niche market of "borderline-retarded spineless sand-packed pussies who are broke?"

      The only thing that springs to mind would be Gilbert & Sullivan with wretchedly horrible rewritten lyrics.

    3. Another "Schmaltard" moment happened during this too. It wasn't as good of one as saying "remember, if you've been bitten you're not shy to talk about it" as he plays "Once Bitten Twice Sky" but it was typical schmaltard.

      At the end of his lamentations he said "I'm too old for this" with a hint of exasperation that was TOTALLY NOT FAKED.

      Too old for this? WTF?!

      Hey dumbass! Are you that retarded you think this is something new? It was the baby boomers themselves who established the use of popular songs in a target demograhic's age range to sell products. Been done since the 70's and boomed (pardon the pun) in the 80s. How can someone who has supposedly had a "career" (BAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!!! sorry there is NO WAY i'm going to be able to say that with a straight face) in radio not know this simple fact?

      Unless its an intentional slight against young people, which is discriminatory, and probably worth another call to your boss's boss to ask why your racist "snakes on a plane" skit combined with this hasn't gotten you canned yet.


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