To All My Friends! Heeeyyyyy!!

I know the right-wing nut jobs think I’m all alone, reviled, a pariah cast adrift at sea, with nobody who loves me.  Only a sister with an overdeveloped sense of familial obligation to look in on me from time to time, always so disappointed that I’m not dead yet.  Years ago, I would have been able to tell you about all the friends I have who I check on from across the street with my 40x binoculars, Super hi-8 video camera and shotgun microphones.  But now there’s Facebook so I can stalk people who want nothing to do with me without even having to move a table by the window to set my bottle of Johnnie.

Let’s look in, shall we?

Now this guy Greg –


This is another one of those lame attempts by a DUMBFUCK to get one of us to behave like he does so he can deny he’s a creepy and demented stalker of toddlers who has no friends but those who speak to him through the magic of technology, right?  Who wouldn’t remember him at all if he didn’t bug them on line late at night when the whiskey is gone and sleep won’t come?

Those friends?  The ones who have too much patience and just enough social grace not to tell DUMBFUCK to piss off and leave them alone?

Well, I’m not gonna do that.  I never was.

DUMBFUCK does a fine job all by himself of painting himself as a truly pathetic and friendless creature who will enhance this world and diminish the afterlife with his eventual (but not ever soon enough) passing.

Die in a fire, shitbag.


Author: Paul Krendler

The Thinking Man's Zombie

13 thoughts on “To All My Friends! Heeeyyyyy!!”

  1. Exactly, beloved HZIC.

    Where were all of these 'friends' when SGotCU was dying? And isn't it telling how self-titled happy my wife died theMerryWidower claims someone with whom it's had no contact in ten years is "like a brother." Most of us don't shun and avoid our brothers for ten years, but can understand why that freak's did.

    If these are truly friends, why haven't they commented on the loathsome loser's grotesque attempts at comedy? Why no blurbs on its pathetic and ridiculous attempts at authorship?

    Lmk when the lyin' of Lebanon sends them a copy of its scout pr0n involved in sex acts with their peers and adults, and including urine but definitely not pr0n* and asks for a review.

    *Like that special dementia isn't like dementia except for affecting its judgment, emotions, executive function, memory, impulse control, causing hallucinations and delusions, etc. You know, nothing important.

  2. Someone really needs to explain to Bill that those sounds he hears are not the applause of admiring fans, but the laughter of the rest of humanity at his idiotic behavior. I am sure there are a few third world cesspools where he can move to, where they don't have internet service, and he can escape the ridicule. Because as long as he stays around on the internet, people are just going to point and laugh at his failures - at his jobs, at his pitiful "comedy", at his ever-changing blog presences, at his broadcasting, and at his lawyering. He really does suck at this "life" thing.

  3. You know how I know those people are not his friends? He wouldn't be using them as pawns if they were.

    It's pretty sad that we treat his acquaintances better than he does.

    1. Heck, the people he's suing treat him better than his "friends" do.


    This Is Radio Drumpf ‏@RadioDrumpf
    Listen, @paulzkrendler, coward, your audio link is broken. Just tell folks to listen here.

    Unless you hit his server, he can't threaten you.
    Which he never probably never does. Unless he provably does.

    This Is Radio Drumpf ‏@RadioDrumpf
    I’m Just Gonna Put This Right Here …

    Someone doesn't understand how the web works.
    But what's another threatening report now, when he's under scrutiny for his behavior?

    Someone needs to point some postgrads at him. He's got at least 2 good papers in his analysis. Maybe 3.

    1. I see the idiot doesn't realize that right clicking is also how you open a web page in another tab.


      But anyway, hey, it's on the internet! I thought everything on the internet was public domain. I mean, that's what Unca Biwwy claimed when he used my picture in his e-book, i.e., using my intellectual property for his personal commercial gain.

  5. May i ask why it is that you hate my uncle bill so much?? So much so that you are bringingy aunt gail into this?? Making up outlandish lies about child pornography?? Murderimg his wife?? Etc?? I seriously dont need to see this crap about my family online. Especially not posts abouty aunt on here. Shes got nothing to do with this. Shes dead. Leave her be please. Wtf

    1. You may ask. You may not like the answer.

      But I don't care.

      The answer, in full detail, is long and ugly. In other words, completely consistent with your uncle's history of online behavior.

      If you want a full picture, you cannot find it. It no longer exists. Your Unca DUMBFUCK has dumped 99.999844% of his dumbfuckery down the memory hole. This is one of the only places where you will find most of it.

      Three things more I will say: one, no one who has come into this situation with an open and unbiased view has examined the record of available information and come down in Bill Schmalfeldt's corner. Not one. And I will state for the record that I came into this biased against him, and I have never seen one thing to cause me to change my mind.

      Second, you should read this blog from beginning to end. You will probably conclude, if you haven't already, that I am a monster...perhaps...a zombie, if you like. But what you will also notice is my self-assigned role in this drama: I treat your uncle with exactly the level of respect and deference that he treats everyone else. In short, I am Bill Schmalfeldt's Accurate Reflection. He really doesn't like it, and that should tell you much more about him than it tells you about me.

      Finally, if you are SERIOUSLY SERIOUS about seriously not needing to see this crap about your family online, then you should take the advice that your uncle is so unwilling to listen to: THE INTERNET IS A BIG FUCKING PLACE, IF YOU DON'T FEEL WELCOME HERE, DON'T COME BACK. PROBLEM SOLVED.

      Remind your uncle that he once had the power to make me shut up, but he lacked the will to use it, and now I've taken it away.

      I may allow future comments from you through. But I have said all I have to say to a pawn that has been manipulated onto this virtual battlefield. I doubt I will respond as civilly as this again.

    2. At least NINE restraining orders from at least FIVE states prove who the monster is - William (Bill) Schmalfeldt. One of those restraining orders protects a 3 year old. Another, from a different state protects an infant that Bill Schmalfeldt posted pictures of with a photoshopped skull over its face.

      Bill Schmalfeldt tormented another family over the stillbirth of their daughter, and continues to do so from time to time to this day.

      Finally, if you find combining cub scouts engaging in various sex acts with each other and adults, urine, and cameras to not be child pr0n, maybe you're a monster too.

  6. Funny that Bill's family thinks it's A OK that he

    Wears military medals that his own sworn DD214 shows he is not authorized to wear.
    He has provably lied about his military service
    (Do a little hunting around here and you will find the official govt documentation that backs that up.)

    He spent the time he was sitting at his desk when he was supposed to be working for taxpayers telling an underage boy on the internet that he wanted to "press my penis against your swollen anal glands" (If you want the link to that comment just ask.

    He spent the time he was sitting at his desk when he was supposed to be working for taxpayers telling an intent forum about his lesbian daughters "twat slime" Again, we can provide the links proving your loving uncle actually did do this.

    He spent the time he was sitting at his desk when he was supposed to be working for taxpayers telling an internet forum about this gay nephew having anal sex. Again, we can provide the links proving your loving uncle actually did do this.

    How about when he got kicked off one of the most left wing websites in America because of his anal rape fantasies he published? And when people objected he told them THEY had the problem. And then he threatened to out a lesbian because he wanted to write and article and she refused to cooperate with him after finding out what kind of man he actually was.

    You want to read about what he said about his late wife? How he regaled the internet about her bladder and bowel movements? How he took pictures of her when she was extremely ill in the hospital and sent them out to complete strangers as some sort of bizarre threat?

    Do you want to hear about the even more vile things he's said and done? It's all documented and verified. You should hear how he talks about his kids. We can provide that to you as well.

    In short, your Uncle is a most vile man. He has made it his life's mission to be an internet tough guy. For decades he's been harassing people, threatening people, contacting employers trying to get people fired all for the sin of not agreeing with his politics. Now he's suddenly run into people that won't take his shit and he has to go running and crying for someone to come defend him. Typical of bullies don't you think?

    I'm sure your Unca Biwwy projects a nice face when he needs to but just make sure you know the man behind the mask before you put yourself in the awkward position of defending a man who thinks high comedy is writing skits about boy scouts anally raping each other and calls it "Fingernails Reeking of Poo"


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