41 thoughts on “Or, 5)…”

  1. I think Above It All Bill we went on shore leave.


    By the way, TENNNN-HUPPPTTTTT!

    1. "writing press releases for Washington was just like storming the beaches of Lebanon, where I ..."

      Oh. Wait.

      1. https://twitter.com/dirtyschnitzel/status/651860524603457536

        Major Schmalfeldt, dismissal with prejudice aside, is making an exquisite case against "intentional infliction of emotional distress", isn't he?

  2. https://twitter.com/dirtyschnitzel/status/651876809496240128

    Sir, Major GS-13 Schmalfeldt, sir! Haven't you spent endless public resources digging through that garden for vengeance, sir?

    Sir, Major GS-13 Schmalfeldt, sir! If you're so upset by what's under the porch. why do you keep sticking your head under there?

    1. We are not Marines, we do not make a 'sir' sandwich.

      Funniest thing ever said in my presence by a head hunter.

    2. He feels nothing, and yet can't quit it for a second. Fixated, obsessed, mesmerized and yet utterly unfeeling. Why, he's been completely ignoring it all for two days now!

      Yes, we all know you're reading this, idiot.

    1. I think T.J. is reclusive because he is perpetually stoned. You ever see the pics of him that Bill plastered all over the internet? In every one of them the boy looks toasted. Guess Bill wasn't kidding when he bragged how he liked to smoke pot with him.

  3. Until Major GS-13 Schmalfeldt takes to Twitter to address the troops again....


  4. https://twitter.com/dirtyschnitzel/status/651903500788568064

    Gee, I wonder if Major GS-13 Schmalfeldt will share HIS Arbitron numbers with us.

  5. http://i.imgur.com/I5Y9R5Z.jpg

    Somebody I trust said that Major GS-13 Schmalefldt killed his wife, but I couldn't prove it, so I didn't say so in public. See how that works?


    1. "Someone I trust pointed me to the fact that" William M. Schmalfeldt of St. Francis Wisconsin is a rapist.

      Why investigate? Some guy on the Internet told me that it's true!

      Now, Major GS-13 Schmalfeldt's wingnut pal on some unread website wants to memory hole that by advertising that he's an adjudicated staler in five states, so who am I to argue?

    2. funny, someone told me that he gave her cancer and when that didn't work he had to work with the whatchamacallit to do the job it just takes longer.
      It must be true since he has never denied it.

      1. Yeah, but according to William. you're just a "felon." Everybody knows that.,

        I suddenly like Wiiliam's standard of "JOURNALISM", where you cite some unnamed person as an authority to publish things about people's marriages.

        It avoids things like work.

      1. Someone I trust told me something too, a while back, but it's not time to drop that bomb yet.

        Soon, I hope to show just how deep in its world I live. The rent I'm not paying for this prime space would put him in the penthouse...

  6. https://twitter.com/dirtyschnitzel/status/651907894062002176

    Ooo! Ooo! Can I guess?

    It's all because of "investigating" Brett Kimberlin, right? That is how all of this started, isn't it?

  7. http://i.imgur.com/000CDP1.jpg


    "By fuck, I don't which Dave he is at which station, but HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGE!"

    That's some gold-standard government journalism, right there.

    Want more?

    1. ... Which of course means he didn't oblige or comply with the no-contact demand.


    2. The truth ain't defamation, Shakes. If it were actual defamation, you wouldn't have asked for dismissal with prejudice.

  8. And my personal favorite, Major GS-13 Schmalfeldt;s respect for family privacy, It's really touching when you read it all the way through.


      1. HEADLINE:"Family Source Says Bll Schamlfedlt 'Came"I Into Stepson/"

        I have a trusted "source" and everything!

  9. And, the bastard actually took the time to go back and edit his disturbing and vile post...



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