I thought it might be FUN to have a look at the detritus and general foul droppings that DUMBFUCK has left in the moderated comments over the last little while. And it might also be FUN to reminisce over the differences between what it has said publicly and what I have seen and not published until now.
On April 28 of this year, DUMBFUCK filed its Big, Stupid, Doomed LOLSuit. For some reason that has now faded into the mists of time, it took its @GrouchyOldLib Twitter account private on May 15. I made note of that here, suggesting that it was “50 shades of…yellow?”
The comment that appeared at 8:13 AM was a manly response that establishes something of a theme that should resonate as these posts go on:
“Think of it more like ’50 Shades of See Your Cowardly Ass in Court.’”
Then followed the May 17 Good Morning, DUMBFUCK! Post, highlighting the existence of a couple of blogs dedicated to DUMBFUCK and its bowel movements in preparation for a colonoscopy. Of course, those blogs have since been deleted (don’t worry, they’re archived). The deletion was a wise decision in retrospect, because it focused almost entirely on DUMBFUCK and poop (but I repeat myself), and barely mentioned the colonoscopy and what utility the procedure serves. Kind of sick, really, as if the subject matter was nothing but an excuse for DUMBFUCK to focus on BUTT STUFF while pretending it had a higher purpose.
On that post, a comment appeared from DUMBFUCK at 12:23 PM that repeated the theme from the previous day:
“See you in court, Palsy Walsy!”
Three minutes later, another comment containing only a link to this very funny Dave Barry column from 2008 about his first colonoscopy.
Note that I said Dave Barry’s column (not his colon) was VERY FUNNY. Because it was. Dave Barry finds humor in EVERYTHING, most especially in his own life. To do that, you really need some serious self awareness, and an ability to laugh at yourself, two things DUMBFUCK has never had. DUMBFUCK dreams of being that funny, and wakes up in tears.
Another thing about Dave Barry’s column, besides being funny, is that it was informative. It outlined a story of Dave’s brother, whose own colon exam resulted in a cancer diagnosis and a positive prognosis, and it also recounted his own experience with the procedure, and ended by hitting what had been the theme throughout the column: the necessity (and relative ease) of getting a colonoscopy.
Dave Barry focused on the colonoscopy. In a key difference, DUMBFUCK focused on its own feces to the exclusion of almost all else (hardly a surprise).
Now, I’m pushing 500 words, and it’s obvious this will require more than one post.
We’ll talk more about these comments later.