57 thoughts on “Hey There, DUMBFUCK!”

  1. Just a few days ago he was telling me to keep my nose out of his business. Today, he wants me to save a faildox for him.

    Go figure.

      1. Hypocrisy, ignorance and insanity aren't bugs in Bill Schmalfeldt's design, they're features!

    1. So now, you're not only responsible for other people's avatars in WordPress, and you're not only responsible for what other people say on third party blogs, but you also are responsible when Bill targets the wrong person?

      Or did I miss a lap?

      Nobody could be that dumb, right?

      I stand corrected.

      1. Google isn't finding it, but way back when the Onion did a side blurb, "English beef cleared for Irish consumption."

        So there are always markets...

  2. You cops are to blame. Didn't I tell you that I would shoot the hostages if you didn't give me a creamsicle shaped like a dick by noon?

    1. Poor kid. This is why Schmalfeldt should, at the least, be on a court-ordered ban from the Internet.

  3. Randomly suing some guy named "Vinnie" in NY doesn't sound like a smart move..

  4. Taking the fall = When Blob Schmalfeldt introduces himself into your life.

  5. https://twitter.com/Grouch365/status/619877092797366272

    DUMBFUCK, the term "Faildox" was literally coined for you because just like you it has the failure built right in. It's no one else's fault that you're a flaming dumbass.

    1. This implies that the all seeing and all knowing Hoge knows who put that link on the internet. For all we know, it could be Bill's "friends" keeping him wound up.

      If you or I were in a LOLsuit against (among others) an old man that kicked your ass several times already, the US Department of Energy, and a law firm with 800 shark-grade lawyers, you might think "the last thing I need is a loose cannon running around." Some people, however, think "I'll set off a string of bombs in my neighborhood to give the cops something else to think about" and might see Bill going off the rails as an advantage, or at least no loss.

    2. And yet... the person forcing the innocent person to "take a fall", knowing the person is innocent, is Bill Schmalfeldt. Doesn't that rank as a bigger failure?

      1. Kimberlin is kinda dumb but he probably does know the velocity that the roundest of his friends might roll, if pushed. If he does the pushing he can get maybe get out of the way.

      2. Rob - you remind me of a phrase we use at work... "You're using common sense again... quit it."

    1. It's at least a tacit admission that William lacks the requite psychiatric wherewithal to control his own actions.

      Hey, doesn't that sound exactly like diminished capacity?

    2. Extortion, blackmail - take your pick. What Bill is demanding is that someone expose themselves to his litigation - EVEN IF THEY ARE INNOCENT OF THE ALLEGED CRIME THEMSELVES - in order that an innocent not be dragged into Bill's madness. And he wonders why we don't want him to know our names? There's only so much evil I'm willing to let into my life.

  6. https://twitter.com/Grouch365/status/619971356160077824

    That would be significantly more inviting if even ONE of William’s lulzsuits made it past the Motion to Dismiss stage. So far, not one has.

    Of course, i’d have to check with Ely.

    In short, SCOREBOARD!

    Lulzsuit the First – Schmalfeldt v. Hoge, et al:(federal) Withdrawn due to an abundance of cowardice.

    Lulzsuit the Second – Hoge v. Schmalfeldt (counterclaim): Dismissed with prejudice due to a settlement William almost immediately violated.

    Lulzsuit the Third – Schmalfeldt v. Hoge, et al (federal) Dismissed due to stupidity, not understanding the doctrine of “diversity of citizenship.”

    Lulzsuit the Fouth – Schmalfeldt v. Hoge, et al (state) Dismissed due to stupidity, not understanding the concept of jurisdiction.

    Pssst, I don’t think anyone’s intimidated, William.

    1. https://twitter.com/Grouch365/status/619972900196614144

      How will that happen? Under the legal doctrine of "Fifth Time's the Charm"?

  7. https://twitter.com/Grouch365/status/619972631530500096

    I don't think "family is off limits" means what William thinks it does.

    Drunken psychopath.

    1. By the way, why isn't William publishing those letters? Has he gotten shy?

      Just remember, boyo, your journalism got you where you are today. Let's see where you're lawyering gets you.

      1. If sending blog posts to Mommy are fair game, I guess William won't mind if some of his juicier writings go to his in-laws, huh?

        Nothing says "Sunday dinner" quite like dear ol' Bill's thoughts on buttfucking!

      1. If this tweet means what I think it does, you might just get your wish....


    2. Let me get this: SOMEONE is saying nasty things about the late Mrs. S. It is sitting in a website that no one has heard about, until Bill S. promotes it, and brings it to our attention. Now the vile things have been seen by many other people.

      This sounds like a TK Production to me. An elephantine failure.

      1. I had the. Is fortune to read what he was complaint about. In truth the insult seemed to me to be limited to him, and his perpetual interest in scatalogical oversharing.

      2. It also raises some interesting legal questions that our soused psychopath might want to ask himself.

        For example, how do you prove "severe emotional distress" about something if you're so busy broadcasting it to the widest possible audience? Normal human beings, especially those of the "private citizen" variety, don't tend to do things like that.

        Why does he want everyone to know what some anonymous blogger thinks of his croaked beloved? And how do you assess damages in those circumstances.

        I keep saying it, but drunk, crazy and stupid is a debilitating combination to live with.

        1. "I keep saying it, but drunk, crazy and stupid is a debilitating combination to live with."

          There's no disagreeing with you, Neal, but what are any of us in a position to do about it but exploit it for laughs?

          as far as I'm concerned, I just wish I could get paid for this. Because if I could make a career of this, I'd never work another day for the rest of my life.

      3. By the way, I believe that William created the Gail blog himself.

        He's losing his fucking mind, you know.

      4. "In truth the insult seemed to me to be limited to him, and his perpetual interest in scatalogical oversharing."

        THIS. That completely unknown blog (well... until BS started advertising it) mocks HIM.

      5. Friends wouldn't do that to friends.

        Too bad for Bill that he has allies, not friends.

        As France said to Belgium in 1940, "nice knowing you."

        As England said to France at Mers el Kabir, https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attack_on_Mers-el-K%C3%A9bir "nice knowing you."

        This could well be Team Kimberlin pushing a flaming Bill off the side of the loading dock. Bill, does what's below you look like a metal dumpster? No, not conclusive, could be the Tincasa.

        Sometimes the jokes write themselves. Usually when Bill is the most important part of the joke, the butt.

  8. Annnnd Schmalfeldt's final descent into madness is nearly complete!


    Let's see, William is convinced that Grady is Krendler to the point that he's broadcast homoerotic musical homages about "owning" him.

    William asks Krendler on Twitter about emails sent to his family and employer and a phone call to his home.

    Grady has a court-issued no contact order prohibiting all of those things. Oh, and William's suing him Grady in federal court, so these contacts might be of some interest to the judge. I can't imagine that they'd at least be sanctionable conduct on the plaintiff's part. And THREE different violations of the no-stalking order.

    Were I Bill Schmalfeldt, I'd have fresh diapers on for when the Howard County Police drop by. I remember the last time that he didn't, it didn't end well.

  9. I think one of his dear friends might have concocted the website; I believe him stupid enough to think he'd solved something when he started in with his faildox.

    1. Great minds think alike.

      By which I mean, I wish I'd read down before commenting.

  10. Ooooo! Are we heading to a moment of self-awaremess on William's part, or is he neck-deep in the nervous breakdown that we've all known has been coming for some time now?


  11. https://twitter.com/Grouch365/status/620001811785744385

    Well, that's a clear admission that Schmalfeldt at least believes that he's talking to Pat Grady.

    Can you say "mens rea", boys and girls? I knew you could!

  12. https://twitter.com/Grouch365/status/620004445166936064

    William, why do you keep on lying about Ely? You're hurting his feelings! You tipped him and everything!

    Are you ashamed about your legal prowess? Figure out how a retainer works? Blackout drunk all week?

    I know you're lying, YOU know you're lying, and EVERYBODY knows you're lying.

    You're a liar. That IS your reputation.

  13. Just how is an innocent person supposed to take the fall, anyway?

    What evidence could BS possibly concoct that would convince a judge and jury to convict an innocent person of anything?

  14. This could well be Team Kimberlin pushing a flaming Bill off the side of the loading dock.
    I find the analogy of Muslim terrorists putting a body bomb on a child and then pointing the child at a military checkpoint more on point.


Comments are closed.