Was a time when a DUMBFUCK professed a belief in Fair Use.  It once even had a little table of guidelines it liked to send to folk it thought took too great a liberty with its “copyrighted” content.


Oh, for a return to the days when a DUMBFUCK pretended to live by SOME standard.  Of course, this was only pretend, because it never bothered to live up to this standard it demanded of others. In fact, the TURDROLLING DUMBFUCK once stole 79% (or 2,163 words, whichever is less) of one of my blog posts without bothering to ask permission and stuck it in a book with John Hoge’s name and photograph on the cover.  Of memory serves, the LORD OF THE LOGROLL was pretty bold about that violation, too.

Because your average DUMBFUCK SHITSNUFFER had SUCH RESPECT for the “right of publicity.”


Rights for me, but not for thee.  Always.  Without exception.


And so, because my purpose here has always been to treat a DUMBFUCK with all the propriety and delicate consideration that MUDDY MUDSNIFFER uses with my friends, I offer the following response to its offer to contact it to arrange licensing of its image, name, voice, turds, boogers, sand-filled & slimy twatty discharge, or whatever else he thinks has some tradeable value:





Author: Paul Krendler

The Thinking Man's Zombie

12 thoughts on “Call/Response”

  1. There's a problem with those p'shops. Blob seems to be making bigs where they belong, on the potty. You may have just defamed him. Or something.

  2. Hey Shaky, remember that time Hodge made you piss your pants? I wonder what Mrs. Twat thought of her big, brave, bar clearing husband after that?

  3. Not a great day for Gail. She;s developing aphasia -- she knows what she wants to say but can't say it.— The Liberal Grouch (@GrouchyOldLib) May 24, 2015

    So instead of comforting his frustrated, fading wife, who clearly needs somebody to pay attention to her and try to understand her, he spends all day talking tough on the Internet. What a guy.

      1. Howard just won the Internet for the day with a brilliant last minute entry!

    1. Bill may consider me an enemy, in Fact I believe he hates me. I am directed to pray for mt enemies ... Gail is not my enemy, but I pray for her each day. Today, prior to my celebration of the Divine Liturgy in my private chapel, I prayed the Moleben for the Sick for Gail:
      Molieben for the Sick
      Clergy: Blessed is our God, always, now and ever, and unto the ages of ages.
      Choir: Amen. O Heavenly King.
      Clergy: In peace, let us pray to the Lord.
      Choir: Lord, have mercy.
      Clergy: For the peace from above and for the salvation of our souls, let us pray to the Lord.
      Choir: Lord, have mercy.
      Clergy: That He will not turn His face away from His suffering servant, and will not despise the prayer we offer for her today, but will grant her health in His goodness and love for mankind, let us pray to the Lord.
      Choir: Lord, have mercy.
      Clergy: That she who is sick may be quickly delivered from her) affliction and raised from her sickbed by the Almighty Word of God, let us pray to the Lord.
      Choir: Lord, have mercy.
      Clergy: That every illness in her body may be healed by the visitation of the Holy Spirit, let us pray to the Lord.
      Choir: Lord, have mercy.
      Clergy: That the merciful God will hear the cries of His unworthy servants, as He accepted the pleading of the Canaanite woman, and will hear the servant of God Gail Schmalfeldt, let us pray to the Lord.
      Choir: Lord, have mercy.
      Clergy: For our deliverance from all affliction, wrath, danger, and necessity, let us pray to the Lord.
      Choir: Lord, have mercy.
      Clergy: Help us, save us, have mercy on us, and keep us, O God, by Thy grace.
      Choir: Lord, have mercy.
      Clergy: Commemorating our most holy, most pure, most blessed and glorious Lady Theotokos and ever-Virgin Mary with all the saints, let us commend ourselves and each other, and all our life unto Christ our God.
      Choir: To Thee, O Lord.
      Clergy: For Thou art a good God and lovest mankind, and unto Thee we ascribe glory: to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit, now and ever and unto the ages of ages.
      Choir: Amen.

      Troparion, Tone 4
      Thou alone canst help us, O Christ! Visit Thy suffering servants! Deliver (him, her, them) from sickness and affliction! Raise Gail Schmalfeldt up to sing Thy praise, O Lover of man, through the prayers of the Theotokos!
      + Glory to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit, now and ever and unto the ages of ages. Amen.

      Troparion, Tone 2
      O Saviour, Thou healed the paralytic carried to Thee! Thou raised Peter's mother-in-law from her infirmity! Take pity on Thy servants! Heal Gail Schmalfeldt’s sickness, and forgive all her sins. Thou hast borne our affliction, O Mighty Lord, Thou hast carried all our sorrows, O Lover of man!
      Clergy: Let us attend! Peace be unto all!
      Reader: And to thy spirit!
      Clergy: Wisdom!
      Reader: The prokeimenon in the 7th tone: Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I am weak; heal me, O Lord, for my bones are troubled.
      Reader: For in death there is no remembrance of Thee; in the grave who can give Thee praise?
      Choir: (repeats) Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I am weak; heal me, O Lord, for my bones are troubled.
      Reader: Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I am weak.
      Choir: Heal me, O Lord, for my bones are troubled.
      Clergy: Wisdom!
      Reader: The reading from the Epistle of the Holy Apostle James.
      Clergy: Let us attend!

      Epistle Reading (James 5:10-16).
      Brethren, take the prophets, who spoke in the name of the Lord, as an example of suffering and patience. Indeed we count them blessed who endure. You have heard of the perseverance of Job and seen the end intended by the Lord - that the Lord is very compassionate and merciful. But above all, my brethren, do not swear, either by heaven or by earth or with any other oath. But let your “Yes,” be “Yes,” and your “No,” “No,” lest you fall into judgment. Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing psalms. Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer of faith will save the sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.

      Gospel Reading + (Matt. 8:1-17).
      At that time, when He had come down from the mountain, great multitudes followed Him. And behold, a leper came and worshiped Him, saying, “Lord, if You are willing, You can make me clean.” Then Jesus put out His hand and touched him, saying, “I am willing; be cleansed.” Immediately his leprosy was cleansed. And Jesus said to him, “See that you tell no one; but go your way, show yourself to the Clergy, and offer the gift that Moses commanded, as a testimony to them.” Now when Jesus had entered Capernaum, a centurion came to Him, pleading with Him, saying, “Lord, my servant is lying at home paralyzed, dreadfully tormented.” And Jesus said to him, “I will come and heal him.” The centurion answered and said, “Lord, I am not worthy that You should come under my roof. But only speak a word, and my servant will be healed. For I also am a man under authority, having soldiers under me. And I say to this one, 'Go,' and he goes; and to another, 'Come,' and he comes; and to my servant, 'Do this,' and he does it.” When Jesus heard it, He marveled, and said to those who followed, “Assuredly, I say to you, I have not found such great faith, not even in Israel! And I say to you that many will come from east and west, and sit down with Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob in the kingdom of heaven. But the sons of the kingdom will be cast out into outer darkness. There will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.” Then Jesus said to the centurion, “Go your way; and as you have believed, so let it be done for you.” And his servant was healed that same hour. Now when Jesus had come into Peter's house, He saw his wife's mother lying sick with a fever. So He touched her hand, and the fever left her. And she arose and served them. When evening had come, they brought to Him many who were demon-possessed. And He cast out the spirits with a word, and healed all who were sick, that it might be fulfilled which was spoken by Isaiah the prophet, saying: “He Himself took our infirmities and bore our sicknesses.”

      The Augmented Litany
      Clergy: Have mercy on us, O God, according to Thy great goodness, we pray Thee, hearken and have mercy.
      Choir: Lord have mercy (thrice).
      Clergy: O Healer of souls and bodies, with broken and repentant hearts we fall down before Thee. Heal every sickness and evil passion afflicting Thy servant Gail Schmalfeldt. Forgive herevery transgression, whether voluntary or involuntary, and in the goodness of Thy heart quickly raise her from her bed of illness, we beg Thee Lord, hearken and have mercy.
      Choir: Lord have mercy (thrice).
      Clergy: O Merciful Lord, Who desires not the death of the sinner, but that he should turn from his wickedness and live, take pity on Thy servant Gail Schmalfeldt. Heal her sickness, take away the pain, forgive her sins, for we are conceived in sin, and our hearts incline to evil even from birth. As Thou didst deliver the daughter of Jairus from the jaws of death, stretch forth Thy strong right hand and raise her from this bed of pain and restore her quickly to health, we beg Thee, Lord, hear us and have mercy.
      Choir: Lord have mercy (thrice).
      Clergy: O Lord, by a touch of Thy hand Peter's mother-in-law was healed of her fever. By the tender mercy of Thy compassionate heart heal today the illness of Thy servant Gail Schmalfeldt, for her affliction is great, and she has no hope except in Thee, O fountain of healings, we beg Thee, Lord, hear us and have mercy.
      Choir: Lord have mercy (thrice).
      Clergy: O Lord, Thou didst accept the tears of Hezekiah when he begged Thee to preserve him from death; Thou didst receive the repentance of Manasseh and the Ninevites and the humble confession of David. As Thou didst quickly have mercy on them, so also receive our prayer and restore Thy suffering servant to health, for Thou art our might fortress, the hope of the hopeless, O Fountain of Life and Immortality, in tears we fall down before Thee; hear us, Lord, and have mercy.
      Choir: Lord have mercy (thrice).
      Clergy: Hear us, O God our Savior, the hope of all the ends of the earth and of those far off upon the sea, and show mercy, show mercy O Master, upon us sinners.
      Choir: Amen.

      Clergy: O Almighty Master of all and Holy King; Who chasteneth but destroyeth not; Who givest strength to the falling and raisest up those who have fallen; Who gives healing to mortal flesh, we beg Thee, visit Thy suffering servant Gail Schmalfeldt, with Thy grace; heal her illness, and forgive all her sins both voluntary and involuntary. Yes, O Lord, send down Thy healing power from on high; soothe the pain, cool the fever, calm the mind, and ease her suffering and distress. In Thy great mercy, be a physician to Thy servant; raise her from her bed of pain and suffering. Restore her in safety and health to Thy holy Church, that she may accomplish all things well-pleasing to Thee. For thine it is to have mercy and to save us, O Christ our God, and unto Thee we ascribe glory, together with +Thy Father who is from everlasting, and Thine all-holy, good, and life-creating Spirit, now and ever and unto the ages of ages.
      Choir: Amen.

  4. "Dear People Who Don't Like Me: Here is the latest tidbit of news which would embarrass my wife. Blah, blah, blah."

    This behavior is just plain abnormal. NOBODY live-blogs the failing health of a spouse. Nobody with any sense of what's right.


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