The Gods of the Copybook Headings


Hey, remember when Bill Schmalfeldt said he wasn’t going to try his case on Twitter this time?

As it will be in the future, it was at the birth of Man
There are only four things certain since Social Progress began. 
That the Dog returns to his Vomit and the Sow returns to her Mire, 
And the burnt Fool’s bandaged finger goes wabbling back to the Fire;

And that after this is accomplished, and the brave new world begins
When all men are paid for existing and no man must pay for his sins, 
As surely as Water will wet us, as surely as Fire will burn, 
The Gods of the Copybook Headings with terror and slaughter return! 

Me neither.


Author: Paul Krendler

The Thinking Man's Zombie

43 thoughts on “The Gods of the Copybook Headings”

  1. We all know that if the cyberstalking freak claims anything, that's very good evidence it's untrue. Lying liars lie a lot. And that lying liar lies pretty much constantly. Even assertions that he believes are true are almost always false.

    No one with any experience reading his nonsense would trust his analysis of the sun coming up in the east. He'd either misunderstand, and make a big feldtchart showing it depends on where the speaker is standing, with only "yes" arrows, of course; or he'd flat out lie as he does so often.

    So, it's always a safe bet that anything he says/writes is either a deliberate lie, or stupidly false.

    1. Yes it is always so inaccurate, so missing the mark. But if you turn it around, it is usually what he is trying to do.

  2. Didn't Schmalfeldt say he was dropping the lawfare? Or was that just another of his lies?

      1. In Death Valley, in August, in a container painted Vantablack.

        Yes, the surface is wrinkled.

    1. Bill claimed on social meta that he was going to let the law suit die. He did not get his lazy ass down to he courthouse and withdraw the suit and send official notice to the defendants he was withdrawing the suit. He is butt-hurt over the fact that Mr. Hoge having been served with the suit therefore as required by law submitted his Response/Motion to Dismiss.

      1. As if Mr. Hoge would be stupid enough to take his word as gospel and not bother to respond.

        1. Only Bill Schmalfeldt is stupid enough to abandon his own due diligence based on what he's told, without considering the consequences of his own behavior.

  3. Shakey believes this is a bargaining chip for the upcoming CRIMINAL proceeding AGAINST him on 16 April.

    He is a very limited and devolved fucker is Shakes the Clown.

      1. But all of them in one go? At least the DeVito character in Twins had a bit of cunning and eventually a conscience.

    1. Oh, it's a bargaining chip alright. Hoge just has to show this steaming pile to the judge while the judge is debating BS's "noble" purpose in violating the no contact order.

      Oh, wait, did you mean Shakey thinks this is a chip in _his_ favor? Because your first problem there is right in "Shakey thinks."

  4. Well, Jabba the Schmalfeldt trying his case on Twitter is like Oliver Wendell Jones trying his case in front of an empty jury box - no one is there to listen.

  5. Had WJJH not responded, he would have defaulted. Even William isn't stupid enough to not know that.

    However, by opposing the MTD, Schmalfeldt is in a bad position, should the Incredible Shrinking Woman take a turn for the worse or, as is more likely, William changes his mind again and decides that he just wants to be left alone.

    My understanding of U.S law (which I could very easily be wrong about), is that you have to convince the judge that you have cause to withdraw beyond a certain point. Given his own words, William's going to have a hard time proving that his health or Gail's are sufficient.

    Oopsie poopsie.

    1. Anyone healthy enough to produce a 3 hour podcast 5 days a week is healthy enough to show up for court.

      Likewise, unless one's beloved is on his/her deathbed, even if they need 24/7 care, it is possible to get a respite care-giver to cover while one is in court. And if the one with the court case has a serious health issue, she/he wouldn't be providing said 24/7 care in the first place.

      And if said beloved isn't dying or needing 24/7 care? No excuse whatsoever.

      Also, if anyone else started a suit against our podcaster and then dropped it, they'd be called a coward, a pussy, and far worse. So logically, the podcaster would be a coward and pussy in the same situation.

      1. Last week, I detailed six different actions of William's directed at HOOOOGGGEEEE! at his Hogewash. Of the five that have been put to bed, four were dismissed or abandoned, and one was settled.

        Schmalfeldt is GOING to try to get out of this before too long, but his window for doing so is closing rapidly.

      2. As if he's the one doing the caring, in any case. I've got this title to a lovely bridge...

  6. "It's ovah! Ovah! Ovah, I tell you. Ovah!

      1. I don't think he's trying to hide that he's a congenital liar.

        But more threats on Twitter that are going to make everyone smile!

        Blood on the Mike @BloodontheMike · 1m 1 minute ago

        This is directed to no one in particular. But if after this moment, 7:49pm ET, Tuesday March 24, If I see an avatar with a pic of my wife...
        0 retweets 0 favorites

        Blood on the Mike @BloodontheMike · 28s 29 seconds ago

        ...I will hold the owner of that website responsible. The website owner has the ability to moderate his comments. No more pictures of Gail.

        Blood on the Mike @BloodontheMike · 10s 11 seconds ago

        I hope I am very clear, because if I see a picture of Gail on any website that Gail did not authorize, that will be added to the suit.

        Blood on the Mike @BloodontheMike · now 16 seconds ago

        Website owners have the duty to protect the copyright of photos taken by others. That photo is, in fact, copyrighted. So, no more.

        Blood on the Mike @BloodontheMike · now 13 seconds ago

        This is not something anyone wants to test me on. I guarantee,

        Excuse me for a moment ....


      2. A few things, Blob:

        1. You are not Gail.
        2. You are not a lawyer, let alone her lawyer.
        3. Your problem is with Gravatar, not HOOOOOOOOOOOOGE!!! nor WordPress, nor anyone else.
        4. How many LOLsuits do you plan to lose? The federal ones are expensive and you can't even dream of filing in forma pauperis
        5. If you wish to care for Gail, you should get off the fucking internet and quit being such a goon.

        1. Or everyone can just add a black eye to the picture and argue "fair use, tranformative", which his was his own stated defense of the copyright case that he constantly declares he "won."

          Of course, Howard might be a little pissed ...

  7. And does William want to share those copyright registration forms with us?

    1. I think there needs to be a doom countdown associated with this. We demand to see those notarized forms, in triplicate, by 9AM TOMORROW or ELSE.

    2. I do hope that those copyrights were registered prior to 7:49pm ET, Tuesday March 24, or else William has spent almost a year looking awfully silly.

      Is he a silly billy?

  8. Who would like to wager that William has posted that photo on Twitter or Facebook dozens of times?

    Isn't playing "Schmalfeldt vs. Schmalfeldt" FUN?

  9. It also appears that William is promising to move back in the adult pornography realm.


    1. Shorter William: "If you don't stop violating what I say the law is, I'll sue AND violate that law myself.

      Oliver Wendell Jones has taken the bench, people!

      1. God forbid Schmalfeldt abide by what he says the laws are! That's only for us little peons, not important broadcasters and investigative journalists.

        Can he explain why it's OK to use my photo of my child with non-obscuring obscuring marks over her face but it's not OK to do essentially the same thing to a photo of his wife.

        1. Howard did, after all, use a "non-obscuring obscuring mark" over Gail's face. So what's the problem?

      1. Perhaps Cabin Boy can't distinguish between sex and violence? It would explain quite a bit.


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