How To Stop Being Mocked For Saying Stupid Shit On The Internet

Stop saying stupid shit on the Internet.

Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt.

Apocryphal, oft attributed to A. Lincoln

People have a God-given right to say dumb shit. I have the same God-given right to mock them when they do. (Truth be told, I consider it a more of a responsibility. Opinions vary.)

If (when) I say something stupid, I expect you to point it out, and maybe take me down a peg or two. If you do it well, I may tip my hat to you.

But if you don’t, well…all I have is FUN.

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Author: Paul Krendler

The Thinking Man’s Zombie

67 thoughts on “How To Stop Being Mocked For Saying Stupid Shit On The Internet”

  1. What if a stalking pervert claims, for months, that you are person X, and suddenly calls you an "anonymous pussy"? What if a stalking pervert admits he doesn't want to be left alone? Are these admissions of error, or merely signs of mental illness?

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    1. “…barley read website..”?

      Rye, oh rye would he write something like that?
      Wheat possible reason could he have for saying that?
      It bagels the mind to think he could have a world wide audience when his reputation is toast.

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  2. Another question:

    If a man constantly talks to himself, yet terms it a "debate," is that a sign of mental illness AND malignant narcissism?

    If a man files false police reports, in which he claims to have been threatened, yet keeps demanding that people come to his home and threaten him, is that the sign of a pathological liar AND someone with a deep desire to be a victim to give some validity to his life?

    And, is he a stalking pervert with a poop fetish?

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  3. Hmm. @/bexmajella hasn't tweeted since May, when "she" was threatening to call peoples' wives.

    Is Bexmajella a legitimate account, or a sock of a stalking pervert who delights in bringing misery to the families of his targets?

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  4. The Liberal Grouch @liberalgrouchcd ·
    If you don't want to come HERE and face me,
    that's OK, 'cause I'm just sitting here hitting refresh on your site all day anyway.

    Willy, you are a blithering idiot.

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  5. Mergatroid, I just tried to listen to his latest "Podcast." Its really unlistenable. After a few minutes of ponderous, pointless, overproduced nonsense, I started skipping through it, hopping to find SOMETHING interesting. Nope. Dude just rambles on and on, overdubbing random weird stuff he downloaded from the Internet and trying to sound menacing.

    Its not even bad in a campy-funny way. Its just BAD. And its bad because its BORING. Even something I disagree with can be interesting. Even something horrible can be funny if its bad in a funny way. Shaky? NOPE. Just a load of BAD.

    If nobody can actually listen to your crazy ramblings, why bother? I guess the answer is in the question- CRAZY.

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    1. So true. I disagree with Bill Maher over 99.5% of the time, but even in his worst rants I find can usually find at least a few turns of phrase I find amusing. I disagree with John Stewart over 50% of the time, and on the occasions I catch the Daily Show, I laugh.

      I think it's going to be a long, long time (read as "never") before their sales and/or viewer rankings are going to be in any danger from the self-styled "Lord of Satire".

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      1. That sounds even worse than I imagined. /full body shiver.

        Sadly, I can't think of anything that would convince him his "comedy" isn't really funny. Lack of sales just means that the peons aren't smart enough to appreciate his comic genius. And that last sentence was pretty nauseating to write.

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  6. The Liberal Grouch @liberalgrouchcd · 10h 10 hours ago
    Here's the beauty part. Hoge and his mouthbreathers have blogs and comments. I have worldwide CD distribution. #tlot #p2 #topprog I win.

    You know, he has a point. ANYBODY in the world can go to the website, choose a cd, buy it, wait for delivery (or download, whatever it is) and then listen to it. While all anybody can do here is click on a link, and read, from anywhere in the world.

    ........oh wait......

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      1. Does my doing comedy BOTHER you for some reason? Does it ANNOY you that my cuts are played on Rhapsody, Slacker, Pandora?

        Funny thing, I've got those services and cant find cuts by Schmalfeldt (William or Bill) or by Liberal Grouch anywhere.

        Submitting something to a site for play and having said sites actually play them isn't the same thing.

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  7. So I guess Bill is demanding Pablo come visit him, because we all know that he won't believe anything posted online

    The Liberal Grouch
    ‏@liberalgrouchcd
    @Pablo_1791 Prove it. Liar.

    Interesting definition of "Leave me alone".

    5150 or bust!

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  8. I was just on the net and saw that a stalking pervert was ridiculing the appearance of LibraryGryffon. Predictably, the stalking pervert is talking about eating feces. Again.
    I know! Shall we play a game?

    What do you call a neutered chihuahua that thinks it's a Rottweiler?

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    1. And typically he tries to start a fight claiming the other did it first. 5150 or bust! 😀

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        1. Involuntary psych hold. Supposedly also the police code for a crazy on the loose.

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  9. Interesting for someone who claims he's fighting against internet bullying. If he'd actually read the stuff he claims supports his position, he'd know that attacking girls and women about their weight and appearance is classic bullying. So what does he do? He attacks the imagined weight and appearance of every woman he doesn't like.

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    1. And intelligence and accomplishments.
      Poop, poop, poop. Poop, poop, poop. Never changes.

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      1. And he once again proves he has no clue how twitter works, thinking that favoriting someone else's tweet is the same thing as retweeting it. 5150 or bust!

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  10. Well I've got Rhapsody, and a search for his name brings up nothing.

    Surprise, surprise.

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    1. Nothing on Pandora or Slacker either....

      Submitting to a site for play NOT the same as having the site actually play it.

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  11. Am I missing a conversation somewhere? Or is it business as usual and Willy is having a discussion with himself?

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    1. Pablo got him wound up real good. I guess if Bill doesn't keep venting, it's like a toy monkey with an overwound spring: if he doesn't let it wind down it will break from the tension.

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    2. Well, he seems to think he is monkeydancing with a purpose today. If his purpose is to help Pablo get his MakeAMonkeyDance merit badge, then he's correct.

      Then Gayle Smallfield chipped in. He obviously thinks that must be Chris Heather, so it obviously can't be Chris Heather.

      Ever watch a dog chase his own tail?

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      1. I had a cat who would chase her tail with great enthusiasm.

        Then, in her excitement, she would bite it, hard.

        Bill's like that. It's even funnier, because I had sympathy for my cat, and I have none for him.

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  12. Nah. We can do a little something called reading BM's time line.
    https://twitter.com/weltschmerz2015/status/552981214026805250

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  13. "Anybody REALLY think a judge is going to put a wheelchair bound man in jail for linking to someone's blog and WordPress sending an email?"

    Jail would just be icing on the cake. I want you uncomfortable. I want you cold. I want you to fall and break your neck. That would be fun because it would be FUNNY!

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    1. I want someone to video him dancing a Polka down at the trailer park's clubhouse whilst guzzling beer on the eve of his court date where he will put on his 'poor pitiful me' act once again. If a slow moving truck with a 'Free Twinkies" banner rolled by, Bill would experience a miracle and chase down said Twinkie truck, leaving the wheelchair in the proverbial dust.

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    2. “Anybody REALLY think a judge is going to put a wheelchair bound man in jail for linking to someone’s blog and WordPress sending an email?”
      No. He'll put a wheelchair bound idiot in jail for violating a court order, regardless of the method. Contempt is contempt whether you violate a court order via a pingback or driving up to John's house and ringing the bell. What an idiot. I guess the murderer who simply blew a mans brains out could plead that he shouldn't be punished because others have done worse by dis-membering or eating a corpse (I know Paul needs live brains, the reason Unka Biwwy is still alive is that he is, as the Italians would say, 'mentale morte').

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    1. I noticed that too.

      You only need to glance at his latest adventure into pathological narcissism to see the carpet burn on his head from when he "slipped" while walking.

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    2. It's the logical progression, you know. He just can't help himself. Nevermind that we have video evidence of him using a walker, not being wheelchair bound. Yet another episode of "they're killing me!" as a court date looms....

      Pathetic used kleenex of a man.

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    1. No kidding. His latest foray into the "Acme Legal Library" says it all. Even Homer Simpson is smart enough to acknowledge he's out of his league.

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  14. Looks like they're trying to lay the groundwork leading up to a Swatting or a false assault claim with all the talk of AW liking/wanting violence and related topics.

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  15. I hereby resolve to never ever make fun of Dumbass's wife.

    After all, through grit and perseverance she managed to survive that case of cancer Schmalfeldt gave her.

    On top of being married to Dumbass, she has been through enough.

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    1. Correlation does not equal causation! But i have noticed that it only rains when the streets get wet. And It only gets hot outside when ice cream sales and crime rates go up.

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