Upon Further Review

For quite some time, my Purgatorial Pet has held in his stubby, slimy, Schmalfeldt-covered hands the key that would free him to post once more at the Thinking Man’s Zombie.  All he had to do was answer a simple question: “what number of faildoxes must be pointed out to you in order for you to acknowledge that you are in fact, a failure at doxing?”

For several months he languished there, steadfastly refusing to answer the question, yet still commenting.  He regularly maintained that the comments were meant for me alone, but just as often they were replies to other commenters.  

Shut up!  It makes as much sense as anything else he does.

As most, if not all regular readers of this blog now know, Palatine Pundit and I have worked for several months now to spring a – what’s that “I write like an eight year old girl” phrase he used? Oh. Got it – a “trapsie-wapsie” on the idiot.  Several of you were even part of the early conversations. PP got in a quick one in the meantime when he changed jobs that I was happy to help with, but this one is obviously more complex and took more planning. But it turned out Bill is not as smart as he thinks he is. Which is a lot smarter than he looks. We finally had to drop one of PP’s old posts here verbatim to get him to notice, but look at the results!

Thoroughly snowed. Epic pwnag3, as the kids say.

Unfortunately, now that he has made it so abundantly clear, in his ever-present good humor, that the dox will continue to be his only weapon and that he will always miss his target, it’s time to take his key away.

Banned.

All future comments go straight to the Spam folder. All future comments that bear even a whiff of his stench will also be sent there. When I bother to check them, they will be collected and sent to law enforcement in the appropriate jurisdictions.

Don’t bother trying to contact me again. I gave it a shot. I left you alone. I went silent. But you couldn’t walk away. You had to take another shot. Palatine Pundit would not say word one regarding how he plans to deal with you. But me? I know you’ll see this before it’s been up for five minutes.

WILLIAM M. SCHMALFELDT OF ELKRIDGE MD, I DEMAND YOU CEASE AND DESIST ALL CONTACT WITH ME BY ANY AND ALL MEANS, ELECTRONIC OR OTHERWISE. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO COMMENT ON THIS BLOG. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO @ REPLY OR @ MENTION THE HANDLE @brainsrfood ON TWITTER. ANY SUCH ATTEMPTS WILL BE VIEWED AS A VIOLATION OF THIS DEMAND AND WILL BE REPORTED TO ALL APPROPRIATE LAW ENFORCEMENT AUTHORITIES.

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Author: Paul Krendler

The Thinking Man's Zombie

82 thoughts on “Upon Further Review”

  1. I have a theory on how this is going to play out. And it should be marvelous!

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  2. Wow! Was that even 5 minutes? Message received; you may want to screencap it before he deletes it:

    https://twitter.com/ComedyVengeance/status/506163168977375233

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  3. The Deranged Cyberstalker, Adjudicated Harasser, and Cyberthug Bill Schmalfeldt is SO hosed.

    His demonic narcissism, coupled with his utter lack of self-control, will do him in.

    Cue -- yet another -- Restraining Order IN 3... 2... 1...

    BS is in over his head. The fallout is going to be EPIC!

    LOLOLOL! LOLOLOL! LOLOLOL!

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  4. Has Biwwy explained why he thinks that Grady (who of course he thinks is Krendler) will need to be subpoenaed if Hoge files a DMCA on his latest bit of verbal spew?

    https://twitter.com/ComedyVengeance/status/506163845585711107

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    1. Paragraph 83 supposes that it brings his silly counterclaim back to life. Of course, going into court with his transparently silly Krendler/Grady theory might get the whole mess flushed.

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  5. https://twitter.com/ComedyVengeance/status/506172874827530240

    And there's no greater authority on the subject of dirty nappies than William Schmalfeldt!

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  6. https://twitter.com/ComedyVengeance/status/506173268496498688

    Says the gentleman who has played the "cease all contact at once" card at least 30 times in he last three weeks.

    Your Americans With Disabilities Act must be a wonderful thing. Mr. Kimberlin says it covers felons and William seems to believe that hypocrisy is a disability.

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  7. I see Willy is rereleasing his "hit" book "Undercover Trucker" on Amazon, despite Amazon already having it in their library (although out of print).

    Let's check on the sales rank for his newest/oldest "book":

    Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #11,189,999

    WOOOOOOHOOOOOO!!!!!!

    Meanwhile "Animus Nocendi":

    Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #821,438

    Well done Willy, down another 100,000 yesterday!

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    1. Do any of his reviews say, "Exactly what one would expect from a book that written in less than a week"?

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      1. I don't think anybody has survived reading one of Bill's "books" long enough to leave a review.

        Either that or nobody has ever bought one of Bill's "books".

        Looking at the eye-watering numbers, the galactically-large numbers, the mind-numbingly embarassing numbers that represent the sales rakings of his "books" (how can a book be sooooo bad to rank "ELEVEN MILLION"?!), I'd lean toward the second but wouldn't rule out the first.

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      1. Not to mention how he talks to Gail:

        https://twitter.com/comedyvengeance/status/506204178969276417

        Poor gal has been carved up twice since she's been with him.

        Dirty, filthy bastard.

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      2. Gail hates the crying bitch.

        THE DERANGED CYBERSTALKER, ADJUDICATED HARASSER, AND SOCIOPATHIC CYBERTHUG BILL SCHMALFELDT WROTE (on one of his many whiny-ass blogs):

        "I’ve always been an easy cryer. The other night, I felt weepy when Gail wouldn’t get up to look at fireflies with me but I managed to keep the waterworks turned off for that event.

        But this got the tears flowing.

        I love Gail. She is the love of my life. I could not survive without her. But sometimes when she’s upset (and she was upset that she had asked me to do something and I got hurt doing it), she says things that hurt. Then she gets upset that you’re hurt by what she said. Then she ran down all the list of things she has to do because I can’t and said she can’t handle my crying on top of that.

        I explained that it’s part of the disease process.

        She begged to differ, saying I’ve always been a cryer when we’d argue in the earlier days of our marriage. And that’s true. But now, like I said, there are time [sic] when I just want to cry and I have no idea why."

        Gail begged to differ because her pathetic-excuse-for-a-husband Bill Schmalfeldt is a useless, weeping, seeping panty-waist.

        Poor Gail.

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    1. How many books does Amazon sell?

      Clearly, the answer should be "more than 11 million", if Bill's tomes can fall that far, what with ties for nth place...

      I suspect the answer must be much higher, however, so he can #FAIL much larger, yet.

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    2. Not hard to get under tissue paper.

      But he brought this on himself the day after the "book" release. He knew Hoge and Krendler both bought copies, and yet there he was, crowing about his ranking (#81 in whatever category it was in) with a screenshot! After that it was just a case of watching the numbers fall.

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  8. https://twitter.com/ComedyVengeance/status/506186628462018561

    And BOOM goes the dynamite! He hesitated for a minute. I thought he was using his head, but, alas, no.

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    1. Heh, I was getting ready to post the same thing, and I was thinking the same thing. He seemed to be thinking about a tweet before tweeting, which is something he never does, but then he did what stupid people do.

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    2. Or perhaps the problem is that Oliver Wendell Jones WAS using his head.

      That never does seem to work out well for the old boy.

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      1. It didn't even take him two hours.

        Oh, William, you magnificent bastard, where would we be without you?

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    1. Seriously, Howard! Who'd a thunk you'd have to post two of Grady's missives before he finally notice? I guess with the dementia and genetic stupidity (sorry Roy, from the other side, clearly), it's a lucky thing poor Krendler didn't have to copy Grady's entire blog! hahahaha

      BTW - Excellent avi - you do spoil me so! 😀

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  9. And ... radio silence.

    I should think that now he's wondering "What have I done?" Perhaps he's peering out from behind the curtains, as well.

    I can't tell you the joy William brings me!

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    1. I guess it's a good thing I have an opthalmologist appointment on Tuesday; I initially read that second sentence as "...peeing out from....", though it might just have been a logical thought based on Biwwy's obsession with "pee holes" and "pee pees" these last few days....

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  10. Oh, and it would be a good thing for Biwwy to learn the difference between "anonymous" and "pseudonymous". Contrary to his tweets, the two words are not synonymous.

    https://twitter.com/ComedyVengeance/status/506186628462018561

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  11. by the time Little Bitch FAIL Whale Willy realizes just how deeply into the trap he has run, the door will have already been closed and locked, leaving him no way to escape...

    O.o

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  12. https:/twitter.com/ComedyVengeance/status/506195273203613696

    I see very little anger here, William. It's usually you that flies into fits of all-caps fury and twelve hour tirades. And how we love to watch you dance.

    I would also suggest to you that Occam's Razor also allows for the distinct possibility that you're the single most malleable man on Al Gore's Internet. You have nothing but time to google everything that we write, and we have nothing but fun. As a wise man once said, "All we have is FUN."

    In fact, most of us are hoping beyond hope that you continue on the path you're on. It amuses us.

    Finally, I'm disappointed that you haven't learned more about how no contact orders work. One would assume that you would be an expert by now.

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  13. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_JoZS6LgqYI

    And just out of curiosity, William, just how many naked male bottoms do you have at your fingertips?

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    1. Where did you get that footage of McCain at the bar after the verdict? I thought I was the only one with that...

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    2. Well there is his stepson that still lives with them. But rumor has it he stays out of the trailer as much as possible so "Daddy" doesn't hurt him again. Allegedly. So I hear.

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  14. (Bad fake Spanish accent) TONIGHT! THE MONKEY DANCES! AND DANCES HARD!!!! (/Bad fake Spanish accent)

    Light the torches!!!

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  15. https://twitter.com/ComedyVengeance/status/506202288667783169

    A few casual observations, if I might.

    1) William's worst invective is directed at women.
    2) William's response to male critics is either frenzied imaginations of their genitalia or possible homosexual behavior.
    3) William has what seems to be an endless reservoir of gay pornography and/or photographs of the nude male anatomy at his fingertips.
    4) He's endlessly detailed his cuckolding from his first two wives but, to my knowledge, never said that he was the one to leave them.

    I'm hardly going to present myself as an authority on psychoanalysis, but sometimes a cigar is a pole that William seems desperate to smoke.

    Fear not, good sir. We won't judge you. You'll always have a safe place to dance with us!

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    1. https://twitter.com/ComedyVengeance/status/506204178969276417

      I refer you to my second point.

      And it astounds me that you don't seem to know what inspired this name, William.

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      1. Is that the one that fucked his wife? Or the other one that fucked his other wife.

        The only way to get his brothers from NOT fucking his wive is death.

        Perhaps they were fucking the mom too?

        Lord knows dad didn't pack the gear.

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  16. https://twitter.com/ComedyVengeance/status/506229650306379776

    Oh.

    Again with the forced nudity. Why does it seem that William's mind always drifts to Abu Ghraib?

    It also seems at odds with his "I abhor violence" and "I'm a useless cripple" stances, but affirms his "I'm a deranged adjudicated cyberstalker" reputation. Yet again, he feeds the Google with ever more examples of his sterling reputation. It's a wonder to behold!

    Why does it seem that William's worst enemy is ... William?

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    1. He has 11 twitter followers and gets a couple dozen hits on his website daily. In the years he's been doing this, it has never changed. When is going to realize he's a failure?

      And why won't he spell out "cunt". He uses every swear word in existence, drops the "f-bomb" regularly, and uses some of the most vile slurs. But he has stopped spelling out "cunt". Does that make him feel better?

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  17. Bill Schmalfeldt @ComedyVengeance · 3s
    Hey, Perry. How are you book sales going.

    Sorry Willy, you've dropped another 20,000 in the past few hours to #842,123.

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  18. Bill knows NOTHING about what we do when we're not online. (He probably can't even imagine it.) Maybe we don't all have barely-selling e-books and CDs and rotating internet radio stations. But I bet I'm not the only one who creates stuff in the real world, stuff that can be enjoyed without having to boot up an electronic device. And Bill seems to have a very self centered view of the world when he thinks that he's the only one who has mobility issues. I can guarantee that he isn't the only one out there with a handicapped parking tag.

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    1. For most of that rant it was like he was looking into a mirror, wasn't it? Wow.

      Now who do we know who has no friends and whose own children want nothing to do with him? And it's not because of "mobility" it's because he's alienated virtually anyone who's ever had the misfortune to have contact with him.

      https://twitter.com/ComedyVengeance/status/506232470250201088

      Freaking lowlife too malignant to understand - ctrl c/ctrl v isn't going to change anything. Getting some help for those personality disorders and that dementia may. What he's done all his life clearly hasn't worked.

      Oh! But this time it will be different the same result there's always been - more humiliation, more rejection, more mockery. Same. As. Always.

      #SchmalFAIL
      #SchmalFOOL

      Like watching a train wreck. Self-destruct sequence self initiated many decades ago. But too vile to get any sympathy - just people pulling his strings to watch his flailing dance! hahahahahaha

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    2. Isn't it amazing how he's the only person in the world who isn't in perfect physical condition? I'm sure my orthopedic surgeons, my physical therapists, my neurologist, and my rheumatologist would find that news. And I'd bet that I'm by no means the only Lickspittle who has a similar portfolio of medical specialists they see on a regular basis.

      And in spite of these mobility issues we all manage to live moderately normal lives, with a majority of time off line, and real world friends.

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  19. https://twitter.com/ComedyVengeance/status/506234608502185985

    I listen. I won't BUY it, but if it winds up on bitTorrent, i'm interested in hearing the voice that can't broadcast anymore.

    Furthermore, William, there's no compelling reason for you to read this and, if you decided to find something else to focus on, you would BE LEFT ALONE.

    Put in a way that you'll better understand, "If you'd just forget that WJJ Hoge, Paul Krendler and the various Licksittles alone, no one would be investigating you or writing about you."

    Sound familiar? Of course it doesn't.

    You brought yourself into this, William, and you re-inserted yourself ... time after time after time. Like an idiot child, you escalate, thinking it'll get better for you.

    How has that been working for you so far?

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    1. gmta, Neal! hahahaha But you wrote it much better.

      He had a week or so of near silence and couldn't stand it. Because silence from us is plain silence to him. He has nothing else.

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      1. Yep, John said to leave him alone and everybody went back to other things in their lives and Bill just stewed until he couldn't take it anymore and had to do this "book" thing, while calling Krendler out.

        The announcement. A couple of days after he promised Hoge he was going to concentrate on "bringing awareness to Parkinson's" and he was leaving everybody alone:

        Bill Schmalfeldt @ComedyVengeance · Aug 24
        .@Harada_no_hime @wilsb8 @xcitizen10 @osborneink I have returned.

        And then two tweets after that:

        Bill Schmalfeldt @ComedyVengeance · Aug 24
        Should you use perfumed soaps on your Krendler? 9 out of 10 proctologists say DEFINITELY NOT! Those scents smell nice, but they irritate.

        Nobody said anything to him, Krendler hadn't blogged in a while. Bill just decided to pick a fight. Now, as always, he's busy picking up and counting teeth.

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      2. Same as it ever was...

        We've proven we'll leave him alone if he doesn't pick fights; if he doesn't start attacking people.

        It's always been totally up to him how much attention he gets and more importantly -- what kind of attention he gets.

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  20. Whoa, Willy just did a major delete job. He must have taken out most of the last 3 or 4 days worth of tweets.

    Anybody else see this?

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    1. Not seeing it - I scrolled back to the 27th. Not saying it's all there, I don't know that, but there are tweets going back to the 27th, lots of them. Well over 400 total.

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      1. Yea, I got them, my browser was wonkiy

        I've been trying Maxthon.........meh.

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  21. https://twitter.com/ComedyVengeance/status/506235208832929792

    And under two hours after saying that he wants to pull our pants down and make us buy him some tasty ice cream," his precious, precious feelings are hurt and he just wants to be LEFT ALONE!

    I don't think William knows how life works.....

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    1. My offer stands, William;

      Stay quiet about anyone here or at Hoge's place from 0800 Monday until 0800 Tuesday and you will see neither hide nor hair of me until at least 0800 of the 8th of September. It could be even longer if you stay well behaved.

      But on top of tweets and unwelcome comments, it means no books or CDs that invite a pile-on, or the promotion thereof. .

      Do we have a deal? .

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      1. Do the rest of us get a vote?

        Why should we be punished because he's a vile cyberstalker, adjudicated serial harasser, slapped with restraining/peace orders from multiple states, admittedly cuckolded, admittedly dementia addled, cyberthug who admits his word can't be trusted or relied upon? Why should we be punished because his feldtcharts only have "yes" responses? hahahaha

        Yeah, yeah, of course he has zero self-control and couldn't possibly manage 24 hours. But what if he checks in to Spring Hills for a day? Oh... wait... I get it... hahahaha

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    2. Hmmm... kinda reminds me of something...

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kHmvkRoEowc

      Complete with, "she's a human!!"

      So should we start calling him Britney? hahahahaha

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      1. Replace the name "Britney" with "Brett" and I think we're onto something here ...

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  22. And that picture of a tattooed ass he posted? Is that supposed to bother me? It's obviously not me (not enough hair, too much drop page & certainly the wrong color for zombie ass). I'd say I wonder whose ass it is, but that's just as obvious!

    What really bothers me is that nasty bruise on the left cheek. I wonder where she picked that up? Was it from him, or a client?

    Wouldn't a concerned citizen, in good conscience, make a call to the appropriate authorities? Maybe make an offer to take the poor woman out of that horrible environment and get her to a shelter away from her impotent abusive spouse?

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